Here's what you missed over the weekend while making up stories about contraction.
WBC apparently stands for We Bad at Catching: USA replaces terrible OF Brad Hawpe with terribler one in Adam Dunn.
It's still better than Pilot Inspektor: Matt Gamel has a kid, gives it old lady name.
This is like the plot of a Zac Efron movie: Craig Counsell is trying out a new stance because the one he used for the past 14 years wasn't getting it done.
I understand the Brewers made the playoffs last season?: Brewers set a sales record on Saturday.
Jim Bowden and Jose Rijo prepare for multi-state crime spree: We'll miss you, terrible General Manager guy.
I don't have a coffee table, just use this empty beer case: Ex-Brewers Head of Scouting invites Adrian Beltre to move in.
The missing piece of the puzzle added: Cubs fans can rejoice because their World Series drought is going to come to an end with the signing of Corey Koskie.
This time, I will pitch with my entire left leg covered in blood: Curt Schilling wants to be a hero and take another long suffering team to the World Series. Like the Cubs or the Rays. You know because the Rays have that curse that has lasted ten years. I called it "The Stocker".
CC and Joba break Woody, Buzz: Sabathia and Chamberlain checked out the new Toy Story ride at Disney World. That cart must be made out of adamantium if it can hold those two.
There was also some games of some sort, but I refuse to acknowledge them. The Brewers aren't the Brewers without Vinny Rottino and Mark DiFelice who are off representing their "country".