07
May 09

Sure we won 15-3 and I personally went 2 for 4 with a homer and 3 RBIs, but

JJ Hardy

I STRUCK OUT AGAINST A SHORTSTOP!

I MEAN, COME ON!


07
May 09

A couple of site updates

Made a couple of adjustments to the site in the past few days.

  • We now have anonymous commenting. From now on you won't have to enter your name, email or anything else just want you want to comment and it will appear as Some Random Drunk. If you want to have your name appear all you have to do is register. We think this will add more discussion to the site and hopefully idiots saying "FIRST!11!"
  • We've also added a twitter-esque featuring where you can comment @ someone. Not sure how this one will work, but thought we'd give it a try.
  • Not really technical, but we are in the beginning stages of planning a Miller Park Drunk meet-up/game at Miller Park (where else?). If this is something you might be inerested in, like this post.
  • Which reminds me, I am obsessed with "liking stuff" on facebook and now whenever you like a post you can like it here too. *thumbs up*

07
May 09

Brewers fan of the day: No ticket = nap time

This was posted on our facebook page by a fan and we thought we'd share it here today.

Miller Park no ticket = nap time

photo taken from inside the stadium of a MPD that never made it into the game. Stayed just like that for innings 1-7. I guess everyone appreciates the 7th inning stretch.

A friend of the poster said that they actually stayed that way until the 9th. Awesome.

I think we all know how we feel about this sort of thing around here: save your blacking out for after the game. That being said: hilarious.


05
May 09

10 Shirts More Racist Than Zambrano Mows My Lawn

mexican stereotypeThe blog world is abuzz with news of a racist Carlos Zambrano shirt. Personally, I find the "Cardinals take it in their Poo-holes" far more offensive. Couldn't they just put Pujols? Do they really think people wouldn't get it unless they added the words "poo" and "holes"? Or what about those Fukudome shirts that said "Horry Kow"? That's pretty racist (like Breakfast at Tiffany's racist.)

Honestly, I don't care. If dumbass people want to wear dumbass shirts, I say let them. Go right ahead and wear your douchebaggery on your sleeve. It makes me look better. As for the t-shirt manufacturers, is that really the most racist you could do? If you're going to go for it, GO FOR IT. Here's ten Carlos Zambrano t-shirt ideas that are much more racist than Zambrano Mows My Lawn.

10. Zambrano did my roof.

9. 4 home runs. 20 kids.

8. Zambrano came to this country on a boat.

7. Zambrano picks good lettuce.

6. Bigger Miracle: Cubs winning the World Series or Zambrano taking a shower?

5. Zambrano only eats tacos for dinner.

4. I keyed Zambrano's low rider.

3. Zambrano: Drunk since 2001.

2. Zambrano's mom is my maid.

1. Carlos Zambrano: World's Tallest Mexican

You see, it's funny because he's Venezuelan.


05
May 09

Braun’s Big Day

Yesterday I had my first softball game of the season. It was a win for The People's Champs so that was nice, but words can't really describe how tired and sore I am. Maybe I should re-think this whole Miller Park Drunk, drinking beer and eating delicious foods lifestyle (pause for laughter). Yesterday was a pretty big day for me, but it really pales in comparison to the day of Ryan Braun.

Ryan Braun

/wakes up

/pisses excellent

Ryan Braun: Well I am off to the doctor for my MRI now.

20 minutes later...

DOCTOR: Ryan, there is nothing wrong with you.

Ryan Braun: Yay!

DOCTOR: In fact you are a perfect human being. You are what Hitler had in mind when he seeked to create a super-race, which is ironic because..

Ryan Braun: Sorry Doc, can't talk. I have to get to Pittsburgh.

/gets into car

Ryan Braun: Oh no I need gas.

/stops at gas station

GIRLS: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WE ARE TOTALLY FREAKING OUT

/smiles

GAS STATION ATTENDANT: Don't worry Mister Braun, this one's on me!

Ryan Braun: Sweet!

/drives down the block, a mad woman runs up to his car

MAD WOMAN: My baby! My baby! Someone save my baby!

/runs into burning house

/saves baby

/smiles

/arrives at airport and gets on the plane

FLIGHT ATTENDANT: For your in flight movie we will be showing The Goonies.

Ryan Braun: Yeah!

Two hours later..

/checks cellphone, 1 new text message

DIGITAL KEN MACHA: we r down 2 we need u k? lol ttyl

Ryan Braun: I don't think he knows what lol means.

/arrives at ballpark instantaneously

/dresses in a matter of seconds

/pinch hits

/hits game-tying double

/smiles

[pic via CuteSports]

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