Well, I'd be lying if I said that #WeLoveAx wasn't the worldwide phenomena that I expected it to be. I mean, you would think saying something nice about one of the best players on your favorite baseball team in a 140 characters or less would be a no-brainer, but apparently not. If there is one thing I've learned in life it's that
I do not look good in a thong some people just don't like to do fun stuff. It's like when my old roommate's co-worker came over to our place to borrow something and when I asked him if he wanted a beer he said "You know I'm only 20 right?" Like wouldn't that make you want a beer even more? Does this look like a frickin' bar to you? What are you a cop or something? Relax, dude. That's kind of what this was like. Or maybe it's like Monday night's game when I was walking across the bridge, drunk, celebrating a Brewers win and trying to get a "YES!" chant started. Nobody wanted to do it. They were all content to just walk across the bridge quietly, talking amongst themselves. I don't get it. The Brewers won. We should celebrate and chanting "YES!" is really fun! Really. Go ahead, try it. I'll wait here.
That's how it is for some people though. They might be afraid of ruining their blog's twitter's "integrity" (kill yourself) or maybe they have such low self esteem that they are worried John Axford will reply to them and tell them they are dumb for saying that (he won't.) Who knows. Or maybe people just thought MY idea was stupid which is totally missing the point. It is stupid, but the point is: just stop thinking about everything so much and be nice. People tweet mean things at John Axford and if you don't like that you should tweet something nice at him to overcome that. It's only 140 characters, it won't kill you.
With that little rant over I want to thank all of you who did participate. I now present to you a few of my favorites. Read the rest of this entry »
For some reason this season at Miller Park they have large dispensers for ketchup and mustard, but not Stadium Sauce which are only found in bottles. I am not sure of the reason, but I have a feeling it has something to do with Yovani Gallardo's haircut. Talking with friends about this injustice of condiments got me thinking. Why do we only use stadium sauce with our brats? Shouldn't there be more uses for this wonderful condiment beyond grilled meat? For the answer we turned to MPD's culinary expert and the the only reader who ever made me cupcakes: lizconsin, who has crafted some recipes for us. Take it away, Liz.
If you’ve ever stood at the Secret Stadium Sauce dispenser at Miller Park, trying to put it on every food item in your hand without setting down your beer, I don't need to tell you anything about Stadium Sauce because you already know. If you’ve ever done this routine with a Bloody Mary in hand and thought "…that could work”, you should probably call me some time. But for the uninitiated here are some things about Stadium Sauce that you should know before we move forward:
- It’s not barbecue sauce. SSS is reminiscent of ketchup mixed with a little bit of everything else on the condiment table. It has a tomato base, but is not as thick, sweet or tangy as other barbecue-style sauces.
- It never has to be refrigerated, even after opening.
- It’s a Miller Park staple, but you don’t have to maneuver through the team shop between innings to find a bottle. It’s available in grocery stores around Wisconsin.
- Bob Costas loves it.
Of course, it’s amazing on a brat or a hot dog at the park, but here are a few ideas for using SSS at home. Read the rest of this entry »
In the modern world that we live in today there are many things that seek to ruin our way of life. Terrorism, global economic collapse, James Franco, anthrax (that's still around, right?), Drake songs, Secret Service men who pick up hookers, Nicki Minaj, gingers and George Zimmerman all threaten our livelihoods on a daily basis. We push on because that's really all that we can do, but there is something else out there that threatens us far worse than any of the things I previously listed. That great danger is cyber bullying.
For the uninitiated cyber bullying is when one person harasses another person using technological means. This could be bullying via facebook, text messaging, twitter, myspace, friendster, google plus (lol), email or a variety of other ways. People use technology to hurt other people. Now this may not seem like a big deal to you and you might think that cyber bullying is a joke, but I assure you it is all too real. I mean, have you seen that Friday Night Lights with Lyla Garrity's slam page? That was some scary stuff. She seemed genuinely upset and she isn't even that good of an actor.
Normally this type of thing only takes places among middle and high school students and we can ignore it like all the other stupid stuff kids do, but recently it has seeped into a part of my life that I simply won't stand for: people started cyber bullying John Axford. Read the rest of this entry »
Miller Park Drunk is the Shepherd Express 2012 Winner for Best Sports Blog.
I got the invite in the mail to this party while I was in Miami for Wrestlemania. I read it, decided not to go and then I didn't really think about it again until yesterday when Tyler asked me if I wanted to go to the party, you know, just in case we won. Again, I decided not to go and instead we went to a Brewers game. The truth is I didn't want to go. I just had all these thoughts running through my head about it.
Do I have to bring a date? Who would that be? What? No, not her. Oh, like you've never slept over at a girl's house and been woken up by her kid. Shut up.
What if I didn't win, wouldn't that be a colossal waste of time? What if I did win? Would I have to give a speech? Would my speech get me laid by my date? Who is that going to be again? What if my speech sucked and I didn't get laid?
It just seemed like too much of a hassle for a web award, honestly. Who cares right? I don't need any validation, I'm a man! Well, today I found out that we won and I was surprised at just how happy it made me.
Look, I know in the grand scheme of things that this award doesn't really mean anything. It definitely doesn't mean that this blog is "better" than any of the other blogs out there or that I am an amazing writer. (To be fair, I am.) It just means that people like reading this thing and I think that's pretty cool. I've been calling this "the best Milwaukee Brewers blog in the world" for awhile now, but that was mostly just pro-wrestling style posturing. The fact that some people actually believe that in real life is a pretty cool thing and I really do appreciate that. I'll try to update more just for you guys. How does twice a month sound?
Okay, I guess this is the part where I thank people. I'd like to thank the rest of Team MPD which is basically just Tyler and Steph. I think you two are really cool and funny so when you two tell me how cool and funny you think I am I believe it. You should tell me that more often actually. That one time just isn't cutting it. I'd like to thank Ryan Braun for giving me so much material to work with, but then testing positive for something and forcing me to re-evaluate my feelings on him thus giving me even more material. All our best posts are about you, buddy. I'd like to thank Prince Fielder for doing that McDonalds commercial as a kid. I'd like to thank Doug and Mark for putting together a team that is so worthwhile to write about. If this was a Pirates blog I would have gave up a long time ago. (Remember when I did that Bucks blog for like a week? lol.) I'd like to thank the state of Wisconsin for being the best state in the world and, of course, I'd like to thank all of the readers.
Thanks to those of you who comment on stuff we do. Like Tuco who actually wrote the sentence "Vince is a kinder gentler human these days" in my defense and apparently meant it or SconnieGirl808 who I have been missing lately. I read every comment and I appreciate all of them. Thanks to the person on reddit who said I was a great guy. (Seriously, where do you guys get this from?) Thanks to all my people on twitter. I did twitter for awhile and thought it was stupid, but ever since the playoffs last year I can't quit you. You make watching a baseball game alone at home on my laptop fun. An additional thanks goes out to the twitter people for getting @millerparkdrunk to trend in Milwaukee during Braun's speech in spring training. That was neat! (I think.) Thanks to the other blogs who shout out to us and do the real analysis so we can do that thing we do. Let me know if you ever want to get weird. Thanks to everyone who came to the Pants Party two years ago and everyone who is going to come to this year's party (COMING SOON I PROMISE.) It was fun doing keg stands in my boxers with you guys. Just thanks to everyone who likes this. Seriously, thanks I mean it.
Finally, I'd like to thank the team of programmers who created the program that voted for this site more than any other. No way we could have won this award without you!
Alright, that's all I got. Real posts coming soon.
milwaukee brewers April 16th, 2012
The Brewers are 4-6. Last season at this time they were 5-5. They have a -14 run differential and have given up 50 runs. OMG WHAT DOES IT MEAN?! ARE THEY DONEZO!? Let's try not to worry about it because it is ridiculously early to worry about anything and take a trip down memory lane to the 2011 season as we review the Milwaukee Brewers' "The Next Step" DVD.
The 2011 Milwaukee Brewers season was the best, everything about it was the best. I loved the pitching, the hitting and the defense (okay, maybe not the defense.) I loved the coaching (okay, maybe not the coaching either.) I loved Ryan Braun, Prince Fielder, Yo, Axford, Tony Plush, Beast Mode and everything else. 2011 was a year when everything seemed to go right for the Brewers and it truly was a magical regular season. The recently released Brewers DVD "The Next Step" given to fans last Sunday at Miller Park sets out to capture the feeling of last season and does a pretty strong job of it, hitting a lot of the key moments of the season that brought us so much joy a year ago with a cast of talking heads who enjoyed it just as much as we did. Read the rest of this entry »