Archive for 2012

Forward Fabrics to Host Thing

Beer, Fans, Off-Base March 28th, 2012

I was prompted to contribute to Miller Park Drunk by the three Ps: The posting (of which I do very little), the puss (of which there is none) and the promotion...

Oh, HEY! Did I mention I own a business?

You may have seen the name Forward Fabrics mentioned on this site. Maybe you "Like" Forward Fabrics on Facebook, or noticed the ad on the right side of this very page.

Regardless, my Wisconsin-themed novelty shirt business is about to celebrate its first birthday. To mark the anniversary and to help kick off another baseball season, Forward Fabrics is teaming up with the now-defunct Right Field Bleachers (which I was part of) to throw a party in Appleton this weekend.

The details
Saturday, March 31 at the Maritime Tavern (336 W. Wisconsin Ave., Appleton).

Forward Fabrics will sell shirts for only $12 ($3 less than usual), and others for $5. "I Hart MKE" prints will be $3 while they last. Right Field Bleachers will sell its remaining shirts for super-low, closeout prices.

Aside from the shirt savings and Maritime's always-affordable drinks, some of our favorite Wisconsin bands will perform. Those include:

Sunday Flood
This Appleton rock 'n' roll outfit is one of my favorite bands and is comprised of some of my favorite humans. At 16 years old, Sunday Flood is showing no signs of stopping. This event will also serve as Sunday Flood's release show for a new, limited edition CD. Hear them HERE.

The Fatty Acids

The Fatty Acids
I've never personally met TFA, but the quintet of Milwaukee indie rockers is my favorite in the city. I fell in love with its 2011 album Leftover Monsterface and am honored they agreed to drive 100 miles to play in a place they never have because a stranger wanted them to. Before this motivated and unique group of youngsters explodes, this is your chance to say you saw them in a 95 person capacity bar. Hear more HERE.

Haunted Heads
Haunted Heads is a no-nonsense Oshkosh rock band who blindsides listeners with catchy hooks amid angular guitar parts. Haunted Heads' members come from the ranks of various noted Midwestern bands of yore, including h. Chinaski, Happy and Drop Dead Giants. Hear them HERE.

Scarlet Escape
Appleton/Milwaukee act Scarlet Escape is technically not a band any more, but we're glad they deem this event worth reuniting for. The band is back together again... for one night only (until they're asked to play again!). They--like Sunday Flood--have played every Right Field Bleachers event. We're glad they agreed to play this one, and you'll be too. Hear more HERE.

The show begins at 9:30 and is FREE. Come and get shitfaced and talk baseball with us.

If you can't make it, you can always order shirts from my site. And I'm sure Miller Park Drunk and Forward Fabrics will collaborate on a Pants Party and post-Pant Party concert in Milwaukee at some point this season.

We'll now return to your regularly-schedule baseball posts.

What Drafting Brewers In Your Fantasy League Says About You

Baseball, milwaukee brewers March 23rd, 2012

Don't let my social awkwardness, my obsession with stand-up comedy, the list of two-letter Scrabble words I've committed to memory, the TWO fact books I own, the drunken conversations I've had about AP Style changes, and my mere participation on this baseball blog fool you... I am not cool in the slightest. In fact, I consider myself to be something of a nerd. Furthering my nerd status is my rabid participation in a fantasy baseball league.

"I got Matsui!"

Unlike its football counterpart that requires NO knowledge or effort, the pastime-NAY-art of fantasy baseball takes considerable research, careful roster management and thorough preparation to be done with any skill. It's also important to set aside personal preferences and unwillingness to draft players you dislike so that you can build a winner. I'm willing to bet someone in Wisconsin lost his or her league last year because they drafted Zack Greinke before Justin Verlander, or let Starlin Castro fall to the next guy in the league because he's a Cub.

Still, it's nice to have a Brewers player on your roster, if you can swing it without reaching too much to do so. It ensures you'll have a real life rooting interest for at least one player on your fake-ass squadron of stat producers. When he does well, it's like a double bonus. So if, like me, your draft is this weekend, feel free to reach for your favorite Brewer... or ANY Brewer left before they all fly off the board much too soon. But know what taking said player says about you.

Ryan Braun - You have a good chance of winning your league no matter who the other players on your team are.

Rickie Weeks - Getting a quality second baseman is important to you, but not important enough to have taken Robinson Cano, Ian Kinsler, Dustin Pedroia, Brandon Phillips or Ben Zobrist earlier.

Mat Gamel - Prince who?!? Prince Fielder. You know, that guy taken eight rounds earlier. That's cool though, you (not unlike the Brewers) chose to fill other holes in your lineup and hinge your 1B on upside. We all hope it works out.

Matt Gamel - You purchased a Lindy's fantasy baseball guide.

Zack Greinke - Someone else in your league either kept or prematurely drafted Yovani Gallardo, so you'll have to settle for the most valuable Brewers pitcher in fantasy baseball.

Yovani Gallardo - See above. That, or you're in a league lacking in homerism and Greinke was already taken. You're still getting a great pitcher... though not a fantasy ace.

George Kottaras - You are in the type of fantasy league where you draft players based on sexual fantasies you have about them. And you had the first overall pick. I wish I was an eighth as handsome as he is.

Francisco "K-Rod" Rodriguez - You're using a fantasy magazine from last year.

Aramis Ramirez - After years of refusing to draft Aramis based on his Cubs affiliation or lack of lineup support in Pittsburgh, you decided this is the year he suits up for you. Sure, he's on the down slope of his career, but good for you on getting a top 10 talent at third.

Shaun Marcum - After making him the scapegoat following his abysmal post season performance, you managed to pull your head out of your ass and recognize Marcum is a legitimately good pitcher, and one of the best (default) No. 3s in baseball when he's going right. Still, with probably 8-12 teams in your league plucking aces and No. 2s from 30 teams, you've hopefully waited until the later rounds to invest in the Shaun Marcum reclamation project.

John Axford - You like mustaches, saves and winning fantasy matchups. Just don't expect his to be quite as amazing as he was last year. 2011 Axford is hard to top.

Corey Hart - You either need a viable second or third OF, or you're hoping to cash in on some multi-position eligibility in a few months. Either way, you'll probably get your wish.

Alex Gonzalez - Scenario 1: Your league uses off-brand stickers that have abbreviated first names. Temporarily thinking Adrian Gonzalez is somehow still available in this, the 16th round, your strut to the board and sticker that bitch with an "A. Gonzalez" without a moment's hesitation--not realizing Adrian was taken long ago and you're stuck with Alex Gonzo at shortstop (which you've probably already filled, since you were intending to pick a 1B anyway). Scenario 2: You are not very good at fantasy baseball and actually wanted Alex Gonzalez.

Chris Narveson - You're like 45 and you are locally famous for some reason.

Nori Aoki/Nyjer Morgan/Carlos Gomez - You're in a daily transaction league in which you always have the top waiver spot. Add that particular day's center fielder and together they'll form one tremendous outfielder.

Jonathan Lucroy - It was after round five, you didn't have a catcher so you thought, "Whatever. I need a catcher and I know this one." Using that logic, you could be the GM for any team Gregg Zaun has ever played on. If you keep your expectations in check, you won't be sorry with Lucroy's passable offensive production.

Randy Wolf - You're George Kottaras. Congratulations. I'm attracted to you, even though I'm not gay. I hope that interesting little piece of honesty at least partially makes up for having Randy Wolf (a solid, albeit not the best fantasy pitcher) on your fantasy team.

Seth McClung - You are Seth McClung.

The Brewer Games

milwaukee brewers March 8th, 2012

Much like everyone else in the world I recently read Suzanne Collins' hit novel The Hunger Games. It was a pretty good read, quite the page turner actually, and I am excited to see the movie. (Woody Harrelson as Haymitch and Lenny Kravitz as Cinna is seriously inspired casting. And I'd like to give Jennifer Lawrence a Winter's Bone. #ifyouknowwhatimean) The ending left a little bit to be desired, but whatever. I'll probably read the sequels. Katniss is a badass, yo.

Now you may be wondering why I am talking about a YA novel that is soon to be a major motion picture on a Milwaukee Brewers blog. Shouldn't we be talking about spring training or something? Well, first of all I'd like to ask: is this your first time reading this site? Just be happy we're not writing about outfits. Second of all, spring training is borrrriiiiinnnnnggggggg. Thirdly, the book got me thinking about the Milwaukee Brewers and their own killing tendencies.

You see inĀ The Hunger Games there is a tournament with 24 entrants and they must all fight to the death in order to win. The Milwaukee Brewers have 25 roster spots. 25 and 24 are only one number apart! The Hunger Games is filled with a bunch of people with weird names (Katniss, Peeta, Cinna) and so are the Brewers (Norichika, Yovani, "Ryan".) Baseball is a sport and The Hunger Games is like a sporting event. The parallels between this book and the Brewers are endless! (Okay maybe not, but roll with me here.) There are so many similarities between these two things that the question needs to be asked: Who would win the Hunger Games if it only consisted of players on the Brewers 25 man roster? Let's find out. Read the rest of this entry »

Saturday Video Time

milwaukee brewers March 3rd, 2012

We get a lot of requests to post other people's content on our page. (I guess this is one of the downsides of being the best Brewers blog in the world.) We usually just delete them because we try to be original. However, sometimes people do good work and we want to recognize it. Or the video stars John Axford and since we are now best friends we feel obliged to link it. You know, either way.

Everyone else got a "fake tweet/what tweet discreet did" thing except for Axford. WAZUPWITDAT? If I made this video it would have looked like this.

JohnAxford: @RRoberts14 lol c u next season fag

After Tweet Discreet:
JohnAxford: @RRoberts14 sweet neck tat bro!

Then we have these dudes at Nine More Outs. Their stuff is pretty hit and miss for me and this one is no different. It seems like they are trying too hard sometimes, you know? It's worth a watch just for the people who let them draw on their faces for cans of Miller Lite. No bottles? #areyouseriousbro

The 10 Worst Things About Being A Brewers Fan

milwaukee brewers March 2nd, 2012

Big League Stew is currently running a series called "The 1o Best Things About Being A (baseball team) Fan" covering all 30 teams in the MLB. (Well, 29 teams. A Nationals fan who can think of more than one thing is yet to be located.) For some reason they didn't think to ask the best Brewers blog in the world to contribute and instead went with the defunct Chuckie Hacks to do the Brewers post. They did a good job with it (read it) and I can't disagree with it too much. I personally would've put Ryan Braun on the list (because, seriously, screw the haters) instead of Ned Yost not being the manager anymore, but I guess that's what you get when you ask bloggers from three years ago to write. Anyways, it was a decent read and I'm not jealous I wasn't asked to contribute because I'd much rather write this post: The 10 Worst Things About Being A Brewers Fan.

I don't think I need to explain that I love the Brewers very, very much. I think that is a given based on the existence of this site and the "Brewers 4 Life" tattoo I recently had put on the inside of my lower lip. But as anyone who has ever dated me could tell you love also comes with a whole lot of hate. There are things the Brewers do that I don't agree with and there are other things that make being a Brewers fan less than awesome. They don't change the way I feel about them at all, but they do really grind my gears. Here are ten of them. Read the rest of this entry »