In a desperate attempt to stay relevant Sports Illustrated polled 215 MLB players asking them who the "meanest player in baseball" was. I'm unsure of what Sports Illustrated used to define mean, but based on the top 10 it's probably just a poll of "who do you think is an asshole?" Here is that top 10:
- AJ Pierzynski (natch)
- Chase Utley (Really? But he's so cute)
- Milton Bradley
- Carlos Zambrano (Seriously, how big of an upset is Big Z and Bradley going behind Utley? That dude must eat babies.)
- Vicente Padilla (Who?)
- Alex Rodriguez (received 24 votes, all from the Yankees)
- Chris Carpenter
- Albert Pujols (Two Cardinals? I'm shocked. Shocked, I tell you.)
- Nyjer Morgan
- Kevin Youkilis (Once again, the Yankees outdo the Red Sox.)
And #13.... Prince Fielder.
Two Brewers in the top 15. Does this mean that we have arrived? I mean, there are also two Yankees, two Red Sox and two Cardinals in the top 15 as well and the only true test of success is how many people hate you. You never hear anyone saying "I hate the Astros" because nobody gives a crap about the Astros. They're just there and then they trade some players to the Phillies and then they're still just there. That's their role. We can't hate them because they don't do anything for us. The Brewers existed in a similar bubble throughout the 90's and maybe, just maybe they have finally broken out of that bubble and other teams are starting to hate us because of how good we are.
Or maybe Prince and Nyjer are just a couple of assholes.
This season will long be remembered as the season that Brewers fans everywhere fell in love with Nyjer Morgan and why not? He plays hard, he acts like every game is life and death, he's been hitting pretty good, he tweets and he's been doing the best post game interviews I've ever seen. What's not to like? He is everything that this team has been lacking in the personality department. Prince Fielder gives post game interviews like Shaq at half time and while Ryan Braun occasionally drops some knowledge on us, most of the time he talks like he hung on Crash Davis' every word. Baseball is designed to weed out your emotions and turn you into a robot that swings the bat, but Nyjer hasn't done this. Nyjer has remained himself, even when he probably shouldn't have. This is great. Enjoy it, you SHOULD be enjoying it because it's a wonderful time, but never forget this: if Nyjer Morgan was on any other team you would hate him.
First of all, he tweets like a high school girl. Seriously, have you read his tweets? Check out some of these recent classics:
Aaaaahhhhh!!! Great win NATION!!! We are almost too tha Promise land!!! Letz go hard 2nite!!! Aaaaahhhhh Gotta Go!!! Plush
Letz keep our heads up and finish this wonderful season strong!!! Thankz 4 Plush rally towels Nation!!! I felt ur energy!!! Aaaaahhhhh!!!
Rise & Shine Nation!!! Beautiful day n tha State of Cheese! Football is back and tha Brew take on them Phillies!!! I'm excited how bout u!!
Why are you yelling so much? Chillax, that's chill and relax.
Second, that whole Cardinals thing. Yes, Pujols was a total dick and in the wrong, but who strikes out and throws their chewing tobacco at someone then calls them a bitch? Come on. YOU STRUCK OUT. And then those tweets?
Alberta couldn't see Plush if she had her gloves on!!! Wat was she thinking running afta Plush!!! She never been n tha ring!!!
1. Albert Pujols would kill Nyjer in a fight. It would be like Sheamus vs. Evan Bourne in a shoot fight.
2. Are you really calling someone a girl as an insult? In 2011? In real life? Seriously bro.
3. You acted like a punk.
Now, don't get me wrong I love Nyjer Morgan, but I would absolutely hate him if he was pulling this stuff on the Cardinals and you would too. One day Nyjer will be on another team and something will happen and we'll all be like that ex-boyfriend who sees his former flame dating a meth dealer and be thankful we got out while we could. (Unless you want to take me back Sarah then I am so in. I can help you get clean girl!)
So, yeah, I can totally see why Nyjer Morgan is on this list. Screw you whoever voted for him to be on this list, but yeah I can see it. Until then I am going to be wearing this shirt.
As for Prince being on this list. I think the time he attacked Manny Parra in the dugout and the time he went after Guillermo Mota in the Dodgers clubhouse speak for themselves. Plus, have you ever noticed the way he acts at first base?
Seriously, what a prick. He should be number one.