Yesterday I made fun of some of the people who read the JSOnline and just a few minutes later I got a sternly worded letter from my good friend Brewers Baby who was pissed off at me for stealing his thunder. "Making fun of the twats that read the Journal Suckinel is MY territory MPD," he said. I realized that he was correct and now turn the site over to him.
|The good news is I will never have to play with the kids of these toolboxes. Why? Because who in their right mind would bang these losers. I thought Cervecerros day was for Latinos, not D&D nerds. There is no chance that these guys don't jerk off to The Guild.|
|Question: if you work at the DMV and someone requests this, do you laugh in their face? Or do you wait til they leave, tell everyone about it and then laugh? I think you gotta go with the latter, teach a man to fish if you will.|
|Needs more paint. I can still sort of tell what you look like and it's killing my boner. I don't want to be the only toddler in daycare on Levitra, MORE PAINT DAMNIT!|
|Whenever your boyfriend decides to paint his face to show support for the Brewers (at what looks like the Winter tailgate) and ends up looking like a bad pro wrestler or the gayest KISS fan ever, maybe it's time to rethink a few things in life. Like maybe I shouldn't be dating a guy who looks like a retarded Jeff Hardy. Or if this is my idea of a quality mate, I should probably cut off my vagina. Just a thought.|
|Get it? Get it? You know, like Gag Me? Get it? Get it? Getttt ittt? Get it? GET IT!? GETTTTTT ITTT? GET IT!? GAG ME, NOT GAG-KNEE, GAG MEEEEE! GET IT!!?? GET ITTTTTTT?|
|"Omigod, take a picture of us! We're at the Brewers game, it's so awesome! Go Brew Crew! Look at my big cup, it's so funny. Take a picture of us! Oh, hey why is everyone standing up? Are they scoring a touchdown or something?"
Honey, if you were my mother I would refuse your breast milk like a cat taking a bath. I would claw your eyes out before I put those things in my mouth.
|I suddenly find myself very hungry. You'll all be pregnant soon anyways, might as well get some practice in.|
|That guy on the right has a bigger load in his diaper than I do right now. Mom, we're gonna need some more wipes!|
|Don't you guys have grounds work to do? I KID! I KID! Seriously though, can I buy some drugs? KIDDING! You got a little Cactus League Nacho on your chin there Jose. No, not you. The other Jose. No, the other one.|
|Another sellout crowd for Pirates Opening Day.|
|I'm wondering if the carpet matches the drapes. Actually, I'm wondering why we don't let natural selection do it's job.|
|Good to see Brewers fans were well represented at Milwaukee's gay pride festival. that guy on the right has "power bottom" written all over him.|
|The photographer in this photo? That's right, Screech. There are two set rules in life. One is you need water to survive. The other is this guy is a stupid f@%kin' douchebag. I'm a baby and even I know a polesmoker when I see one.|
|Apparently the Red Sox mascots are used tampons. Fenway Park: where Lindsay Lohan's old tampons live forever.|
|"Hi, I'm living proof that you can be a serial killer AND a Brewers fan. You can do both." Good to know.|