Hey, what are you doing Sunday August 29th? There is a Brewers game that day, you know. They're even giving away CC Sabathia bobbleheads. Remember him? He was the star of the last awesome Brewers team, remember? Man, those were some good times. Seems like so long ago.

So, you thinking about going? Because I am going and I have a few extra tickets and.... yeah. We're having a party.

More specifically we're having...

Miller Park Drunk's Pants Party

It's like a party, but in my pants. Except it's not in my pants, but I am just saying that to sound funny. It's actually at Miller Park. Yep.

Here's what it includes:

  • A terrace reserved ticket! (a $15 value)
  • A CC Sabathia bobblehead! (a billion million dollar value)
  • A pre-game tailgate featuring tons of food! (unfortunately catered by a slimy Phillies fan, a negative value)
  • A pre-game tailgate featuring tons of keg beer that you can drink without paying for! (a $1000 value)
  • A pre-game tailgate featuring tons of Columbian cocaine! (a $80/gram value)
  • Maybe a t-shirt! (a $2 value)
  • Giveaways of stuff! (a $0.36 value)
  • More stuff that we haven't thought about yet! (projected value: unknown)

All for the low price of $25! Space is limited, but that's okay because this site doesn't have that many fans to begin with. If you'd like to buy a ticket for yourself or you and a friend all you have to do is click this magic paypal button below to pay me. I plan on making zero profit on this game and simply getting real drunk with a ton of people who think I'm a semi-decent writer. Really, it's its own reward.

If you like the Brewers or if you like this site or if you just like drinking, I think you will want to be at this event. It is going to be awesome. Really, really awesome and it's on a Sunday during the day, what else do you have to do?

Church? That shits for losers.
Art in the park? More like fart in the park. AMIRITE!?
A picnic with your girlfriend? Oh, does your vagina get to come too?
Walk your dog? Man, F your dog.

Seriously. Come to Miller Park and get way too drunk before noon. It'll be fun. I promise. Now send me my frickin' twenty five dollars. Shits expensive, dog.

Vince Morales is the guy who runs this site. He likes the Milwaukee Brewers, pro wrestling and beer. If he offended you he is very, very sorry.

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5 comments on “ANNOUNCEMENT: Miller Park Drunk’s Pants Party

  1. Anonymous on said:

    So…this party in your pants sounds like a good time! I am just wondering what my chances are of getting some considering I took your advice and went to singles night expecting to get laid as you lead me to believe…well, I did not!

  2. Citizens Bank Park Drunk on said:

    ^ To quote the magic 8 Ball “Outlook good”… and bring your appetite!

  3. Anonymous on said:

    Sounds like the Brewer Trollops are getting restless! I’m gonna bring my beer swillin’ self to your trough and see what kind you all are catchin’

  4. Pingback: Mucho Milwaukee » Blog Archive » Recent blog roundup

  5. Pingback: Miller Park Drunk | The almost last thing you will hear about the Pants Party

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