AJ Lee: A GIF Appreciation

August 1st, 2012

My love of pro wrestling is no secret. I went to Wrestlemania last year and I am going again this year. I'm going to Chikara in two weeks. I'm wearing a Colt Cabana t-shirt right now. I've made two awkward appearance on TH's The Wrestling Podcast. It's just my thing. I always have and always will love this stupid deal where people pretend to fight and put oil all over their bodies. I just love it.

Because of this I often find myself falling in love with the girls on the screen. She likes wrestling and she is attractive? Sign me up! Last summer my dad and I went to Chikara in Chicago and after watching Sara Del Rey kick the living shit out of Icarus I could tell he had a bit of a crush going on. Which was weird because I didn't want to have to fight my own dad to the death over her. When I was in high school and starting to figure out that boobs were the best thing in the world, WWE gave me Sable who had enormous fake ones that she had no problem showing me. It was love at first breast. Then they followed her with Trish Stratus who made me fall in love all over again and still does a little bit. Then Stacy Keibler who is hot enough for George Clooney so like really hot. Then Melina whose entrance made me somewhat uncomfortable (in a good way.) Then Maryse who was hot until I found out she was banging The Miz. (Seriously, I'd rather be with someone that had face herpes than someone The Miz touched.) All these girls with many in between have made me continually have crushes/infatuations with the women involved in professional wrestling.

Here's the thing though. They are all pretty girls, but at the same time they are "wrestling pretty." Much like a stripper seems pretty because she is taking her clothes off a lot of these girls seem prettier just because they are on a wrestling show. You guys remember that period where WWE convinced us that Chyna was really hot and she did two Playboys? Yeah, WWE (and plastic surgery) convinced us that THIS was really hot. I used to think Francine was gorgeous and she's really not (see if you can guess why I thought that.) That's what I'm talking about. This isn't a knock on the women at all. They are pretty girls who could probably kick my ass, but if you stand 98% of them next to Alison Brie or Anne Hathaway they look homely. A pretty girl in something you like looks 1000% prettier than if she was in something you didn't like. Look at Starbuck from Battlestar Galactica. Pretty? Yes. omg da prettiest girl ever? No, but don't tell that to some Battlestar fanboys. It's just the way it is. Why do you think I hook up with so many ugly girls in Rickie Weeks jerseys? Our mind plays tricks on us sometimes.

AJ changed all of that because AJ is not only the prettiest girl to ever grace a wrestling ring. Actually AJ is the prettiest thing ever. AJ is cute in a way that you don't want to take her home and do adult things to her (like your taxes), she is cute in a way that you want to steal her and put her in your pocket and never let anyone see her ever. You want her all to yourself all the time. If you can't have AJ then nobody can. AJ makes you crazy with how pretty she is. It doesn't hurt that she is frickin' amazing at her job either. She gives the absolute best facials in all of WWE. (If you make a sex joke about her right now I will end you. Real talk, you will die.) She plays her character to an absolute tee. Much like Daniel Bryan, CM Punk, Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels did, AJ proves that what WWE thinks a Superstar or Diva is "supposed" to look like is completely wrong. AJ is 5'3" and 107 pounds of the absolutely best part of their show. I want her to stop being on WWE right now because she's almost too good for it. She is just so good, so perfect right now that I don't want there ever to be a chance for it to be ruined. I want to stay in the honeymoon phase of this relationship forever.

And if we can't? Well at least I still have all these gifs.

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And now for the YES gifs and the part where I die.

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I love her so much.

(All of these gifs came from Wrestling With Text which is basically my favorite site for Raw/Smackdown/Impact recaps ever. Check it out.)

Vince Morales is the guy who runs this site. He likes the Milwaukee Brewers, pro wrestling and beer. If he offended you he is very, very sorry.

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2 comments on “AJ Lee: A GIF Appreciation

  1. Jesse on said:

    It’s the skipping around Kane one that gets me. Up until then, I had no idea the simple act of skipping could be so damn adorable.

  2. WrasslorMonkey on said:

    And to make it easy for the AJ marks (myself included) there’s the AJ tag page http://wrestlingwithtext.com/tag/aj+lee

    There’s a couple gifs of her displaying her grace in the ring by ramming her boots in one of the Bella’s face and her knee upside Vickie’s head.

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