What are you running from, Alcides Escobar?

Baseball December 10th, 2009

I am nothing if not a people pleaser so when a commenter requested that we do a story about the Brewers being more open to running next year and "what the Brewers are running from?" I had to oblige and present you THE RUNNING SERIES.

Brewers Cardinals Baseball

My crazy ass baby's momma. What the hell do you think I'm running from? Have you seen this youtube video?

And her mother too. Holy Christ, I gotta start wearing condoms.

JJ Hardy: Step by Step

Baseball November 18th, 2009

newkidsA buddy of mine asked me why we haven't covered the departure of "gay-gay" yet and I really didn't really have a good explanation for him. The Brewers career of JJ Hardy is the kind of career that was great at the time, but over the years we'll eventually forget all about it. Kind of like New Kids on the Block. Like NKOTB, JJ was beloved by young girls and just like NKOTB, JJ peaked at a young age. Don't believe me? Let's take a look at the seemingly parallel careers of JJ Hardy and New Kids on the Block. Read the rest of this entry »

Carlos Gomez: Miller Park Drunk vs Al’s Ramblings

Baseball November 9th, 2009

Twins Go Go Gomez BaseballI've been reading Al's Ramblings over the weekend and I was shocked at how Al was slowly convincing himself that he really liked this trade. I mean, this is the same guy who thought Corey Hart would be a good center field option and now he's down with a .287 on base percentage? This didn't seem right to me so I shot him an email and decided to engage in a little conversation with him (like we did before). Here's what we came up with. Beware nerdy baseball talk ahead.

MPD: Alright Al I have a bone to pick with you about this Hardy/Gomez trade. Sure, it's a cheap alternative who is great at defense (just like the cheap alternative that is great at defense we have at shortstop), but you of all people should hate this trade. After all you are the one who is constantly talking up the excellence of OXS in predicting runs and you are the one who takes joy in the failures of Jack Wilson. Now, you're okay with a lineup where 1/3 of the players in it have a combined OPS of 650-700 (and that's without including the pitcher.) Seriously, look at this group as it stands now: Read the rest of this entry »

Anatomy of a Play

Baseball September 14th, 2009

In case you missed the Brewers game yesterday (and I am guessing you probably did), Alcides Escobar made probably the best play I have seen all year. I described it on twitter as "alcides with a play jj is incapable of dreaming about" and later Al's Ramblings said basically the same thing (I would link to the post but Al has a terrible CMS that won't allow it). If you didn't see it or just want to watch it again, here it is.

Whenever you see a play like that you are awestruck and filled with questions. How did he do that? What was going through his mind on the play? Well, luckily for you I have the upgraded version of MLB.tv which includes a new feature called mind reading which I have transcribed for your enjoyment. Read the rest of this entry »

Meet Alcides Escobar ladies

Baseball September 1st, 2009

Sometimes I forget that I may have more female readers than I have male readers and that talking negatively about JJ Hardy is probably not the best course of action. The problem is the JJ days are probably over. The Alcides Escobar era is here and there's nothing we can do about it. I want the ladies to love Alcides, but the fact is that he is nowhere near as good looking as JJ Hardy. A friend of mine tells me that he enjoys vodka/cranberry and Michael Jackson, but that's just not enough to make this happen. We need more.

Luckily for Alcides he has me on his side. Here's 10 things that Alcides Escobar can do (scratch that, WILL DO) to make the ladies love him like they love JJ. When we're done with him he's going to make JJ Hardy look like Jonathan Knight (to his Donnie Wahlberg (or Joey McIntyre depending on your preference)) and no one will care when he comes out of the closet.

Read the rest of this entry »

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