06
Aug 09

Dear Journal Sentinel Anthony Witrado is a douchebag and you should probably fire him

Hey. Journal Sentinel, what's up? It's your boy, Miller Park Drunk. How's it going? Yeah, that whole death of print thing really sucks. Oh, that's funny!

Listen, let's get down to business here. I am here to talk serious business. I am here to talk about the sports section of your paper. You have this guy writing for the Brewers who is absolutely terrible. I am not kidding. He sucks. He blows. He is quite possibly the worst beat writer in the entire MLB. Did you know there are teams in Baltimore and Oakland? There is! And these teams that are located in WAR ZONES have better beat writers than Anthony Witrado. There's something wrong with this picture right? I know we've been through this before. I know that we (and everyone else that cares about the Brewers) have said this before, but this time it's serious. Anthony Witrado should be fired. Continue reading →


03
Mar 09

To all da haterz

Anthony Witrado: retard(Editor's Note: It seems as though local Brewers beat writer Anthony Witrado has had enough of the local blogosphere's picking on his writing. That's why he's here to defend himself.)

To all da haterz:

Yo, this yo boy the original A-Dub A.K.A. Stone Cold Killa A.K.A. Brewers beat writer Anthony Witrado and I am tired of y'alls bullsh*t. Its like, everyones gots a problem with my grammar and spelling and shit. Look, I ain't no English major. When I was in college I always skipped that stupid class to go party and sleep with girls, something readers of my mailbag probably know nothing about lol. And sometimes I say the Dodgers when I mean the Angels or mispell a pitchers name, to that I say .. uh... WHO CARES? Baseball is boring anyways, it's not like it matters who the Brew is playin or whose pitching for the other team. It's spring training man, nobody cares! I just file my reports as quick as possible so i can hit up the Maryvale scene. (I met this fine little shorty the other night at an 18 and up club, she had them apple bottom jeans boots with the fur (lol!). She said she had to get home before curfew, but I got her digits You Know.. hahaha.) If you want like real baseball news, like whose pitching and whos playing don't go to JSOnline! Go to like majorleagues.com or whatever it is and get that info. I got better things to do, ya know? Continue reading →


24
Feb 09

All Eyez On A-Dub

Okay, I take it back. I take back everything I said negatively about Ryan Braun's clothing line and the way he dresses. As long as he never dresses like Anthony Witrado of the Journal Sentinel I'll be happy.

(click for video)

(click for video)

If you don't feel like or can't watch the video, I have transcribed it for you below.

YO DIS YO MAN A-DUB FROM THE MILWAUKEE JIZOURNAL SENTO! I'M HEAR LIVE FROM SPRING TRIZZY REPORTIN' ON DA BREW CREW! MY HOMEY BILLY HALL HAD LASIK SURGERY ON HIS EYEZ MAN! HE SAY THIS SEASON IS GON' BE OFF DA CHAIN FO SHEEZY! I JUST WANNA GIVE A QUICK SHOUTOUT TO MY MAN RAY-J WHOS LOOKIN' FOR HOT BITCHZZ ON VH1 RIGHT NOW, ONE LOVE HOMIE. SAY HI TO KIM FOR ME LOLZ! I GOTS TO BE GOIN' NOW CUZ I GOTS TO RITE SOME ARTICLES AND SHIT. GOTS TO GET PAID NA MEAN?! PEACE!

(throws up W with fingers)

WESTSIDE!!!!!!

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