Who doesn't like a good pun? More importantly, who doesn't love a bad pun?
Baseball can be kind of a boring game in between all the really exciting things that happen. There is a lot of time for conversation and with conversation comes jokes. Good jokes, dirty jokes and most of all bad jokes will be strewn across Miller Park this year more than Miller Lites. You will hear a lot of jokes at the park this year, but almost none of them will be good. You have to learn to expect them so that you aren't caught off guard by them. You need to be prepared for the polite laugh you are sure to give the co-worker you don't really like that much or the lonely uncle who offered to buy your ticket. Luckily for you, we have the inside track on the hottest bad jokes for 2011. We can see them coming before the bad joke teller can and we're going to share them with you right here. Preparation is the key to success. Or something. Continue reading »
Lost in the shuffle of how awesome 2011 is going to be with the additions of Zack Greinke and Shaun Marcum, was how truly awful 2010 was. Despite our optimism, this team was eliminated by May and had most fans clamoring for a fire sale at the trade deadline. A lot of the reasons for the team's lack of success were stupid ("Ryan Braun is spending too much time on his restaurants and clothing line!"), some of them had basis in reality ("Coffey is eating too much!"), and some of them were just about Ken Macha sucking, but I don't think anyone can deny how much these ten people screwed up the Brewers' 2010 season.
That's right, it's end-of-the-year list time, and instead of looking back on our favorite moments (of which there are two, trading for Shaun Marcum and trading for Zack Greinke), we want to look back on the ten people who screwed the Brewers in 2010 harder than any of the guys your mom brought home. Luckily for us, just like your mom's "night visitors," most of these guys won't be back either. Continue reading »
What are the Brewers going to do this offseason? Who knows? Doug Melvin has seemed non-committal whenever he's asked about anything and nobody else is talking. Prince Fielder is yet to be traded. Rickie Weeks is yet to be re-signed. What does it all mean? Did the top stop spinning at the end?
I don't claim to know what they are going to do or even what they could do, but I can idly speculate. That's why we're bringing you the first in a series: What are they gonna do?
Going for it is the plan that pretty much all Brewers fans want to see. Screw the future, we want to win. You would put up with four 90 loss seasons if it resulted in one World Series win (I doubt this), you wouldn't even complain about it (I highly doubt this). After getting a taste of the playoffs and winning baseball a couple of years ago (three years, really?) we have been starving for more ever since, kind of like your sister after that one time. We want to win. The Cubs sucks. The Astros suck. The Cardinals aren't unbeatable. Let's do it. Let's go for it all. Now.
What would the Brewers have to do to make this sort of thing a reality? Well, I would imagine it would look like this:
Keep Prince Fielder
Don't trade anyone from the current roster unless that person is Carlos Gomez
Trade Jeremy Jeffress, Brett Lawrie, Mat Gamel and every single player it would take for Zack Greinke
Offer Cliff Lee twenty five million per season
Offer Brandon Webb a 1-year contract loaded with incentives that could see him make $15 million, possibly with a player option for 2012
Settle on overpaying Carl Pavano
Sign Rafael Soriano or Grant Balfour to three year $30 million contract
This would give the Brewers a great rotation, solidify the bullpen even more while maintaining the core of the offense. They would be, undoubtedly, the favorites to win the National League Central and probably at least an 8-1 bet to make the World Series. This would be the very definition of "going for it". So what's the problem? Continue reading »
We get a lot of hits from search engines. Almost 3000 last month alone. Sometimes it's people looking for our site who are too lazy to type the address in and other times it's people trying to find pictures of Randy Wolf's girlfriend. Which I love because this is what they find:
That picture gets me every time.
Anyways, some of the search terms are kind of insane and hilarious and we thought it'd be fun to share some of the better ones. Continue reading »
Yesterday for the fifth straight game Carlos Gomez was not in the starting lineup for the Milwaukee Brewers. There are many theories as to why this is. Some point to his comments about Lorenzo Cain when he said:
"I'm the best centerfielder on the team. But Lorenzo is doing a really good job for the last two weeks and it's not fair for me to come off the DL and take his chance. I understand. He is a really good player, but I think I'm still the man on this team."
That would make sense. Others simply point to his horrendous .229/.286/.348 line and compare them to... anybody and it makes perfect sense why he's not been playing.
The debate as to whether Gomez should or shouldn't play, or should or shouldn't be re-signed is something that has been discussed heavily in the Brewer community over the past few weeks. However, it's hard to discuss these sorts of things if you don't know all of the facts.
Luckily, we have all the facts. Luckily, we have sources within the Brewers to let us know why certain things happen. We know why Carlos Gomez hasn't been playing and lucky for you we're not above betraying our sources to tell you why. Continue reading »