Keep watching, the best part hasn’t even happened yet

Baseball August 21st, 2009

Drunk Brewers fanIt seems that the bandwagon is emptying at an alarming rate. I try to keep positive because, well for one it's not very smart for me to say "stop caring about baseball, the Brewers season is over! Go find another blog!" and two, it's still baseball. Crazy things happen all the time. You just never know. Of course with every loss to the Pirates, you kind of DO know.

A recent poll on Brew Crew Ball has 1% of Brewers fans saying they won't give up on the season until it's over with 83% having already given up. 83%!!!! I'm not exactly sure what this means though. If you are among the 83%, do you still care about what happens? Or have you mentally checked out? Have you moved on to football season? If this is the case, I ask you to reconsider. This Brewers season is not the one we wanted, but it's still the Brewers season. It's kind of like a bad porno. Sure, the girls aren't as hot as you expected and they're all tatt'ed up like Josh Hamilton. Sure, there is too much closeup. Sure, the plot sucks and the music is terrible. The fact of the matter is it's still a porno, it's still people having sex. Despite it's problems there are a number of good reasons to continue watching the Brewers. Just like you keep watching the porno for the T&A, you should keep watching the Brewers for these reasons (and just like in porno not one of them is a "sausage race".) Read the rest of this entry »

Felipe Lopez joins the Brewers

Baseball July 20th, 2009

Doug Melvin Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you to the newest member of the Milwaukee Brewers, Felipe Lopez!
felipelopez Hey guys, what's up? I'm happy to be here.
casey mcgehee HO-LA!
felipelopez Uhhh, hi. Casey McGehee, right? I think you're a great ball player.
casey mcgehee HABLA INGLESIAS?! Read the rest of this entry »

Ryan Braun has a funny way of inspiring people

Baseball July 6th, 2009

Ryan+Braun+Darren+Hauck+AP

Hey, you. Mark Burns? I'm sorry, Mike Burns. Listen Mark, I want to talk to you about your pitching. It's not good. I'm just going to come right out and tell you right now that if Dave Bush comes back from the DL, I am sending you down to the minors. We're also looking into some trades right now and if we find the right fit, we will demote you. Just wanted to let you know.

Same goes for you too Seth. We probably won't release you or send you to the minors, but you're definitely out of the rotation. I won't have it. I might actually decide to trade you if you keep this up.  Just so you know, nothing personal. I just find you to be a terrible pitcher and don't really like you as a person. Nothing personal though.

Hey Mr. Mustache, are you going to make a freakin' trade or what? Do I have to do everything for myself around here? Get me some help. We can't spot every team four run leads. Seriously, how hard is your job? Pick up the phone and do something.

Prince, put that down. Don't eat that. Dammit man, we're All-Stars. Eat like one. I don't care if it's a veggie burger, Krispy Kremes are not buns.

What are you looking at Corey? Why don't you get a freakin' haircut and shave your face? You're a Milwaukee Brewer, not a Milwaukee Meth Cook.

Yo A-Dub, cool shirt. With that being said, learn how to write would you? You misspelled home run last week. I don't need that.

'Oh look at me, I'm Casey McGehee. I'm getting all these hits, but I can't even play the field.' Come on, man. Even I can play third base better than you.

Speaking of third base, where's Bill Hall? He better be in the batting cage so help me God.

Hey Jeff Suppan just wanted to congratulate you on pitching so well for the first time in your life. Great work.

You guys know what would be cool to have on our team? A pitcher that hits like a pitcher batting 8th. Oh wait we already have that. His name is Jason Kendall. Nevermind.

Macha take Willie with you and go get my dry cleaning. It's the least you could do to help this team.

Braun out.

Miller Park Drunk Silver Lining: Casey McGehee

Baseball June 26th, 2009

The Brewers haven't been playing that good lately and it's hard to get excited about the team. Maybe the games on TV don't feel as "can't miss" as they used to, maybe you aren't in as big of a rush to leave the parking lot as you normally are or maybe you don't update your popular blog as much as you normally do. Try and remember, there are good things going on with this team even if they aren't winning.

We got Casey McGehee from the Cubs, for nothing. Nothing. He is currently hitting .344 with a .925 OPS. That's good. Do you think the Cubs miss him? Do we like having him? That's an excellent silver lining right there. Casey McGehee being a Brewer helps us and hurts the Cubs, that's awesome. Know what else is awesome? These FUN FACTS about Casey McGehee.

  • Casey McGehee went to Fresno State. Other famous Fresno State alums include Pauly Shore, former Rams coach Mike Martz and Skip-2-my-lou Rafer Alston.
    pauly
  • Casey's birthday is October 12th. Other notable people born on October 12th: Hugh Jackman and Kirk Cameron.kirk-cameron
  • Casey isn't that bad at defense either.
  • Despite being older than him, Craig Counsell is his son.
  • Casey is not exactly what you might call "buff" or "in shape", which always makes you like a player a bit more. There's just something about a player that would easily beat you in a wing eating contest.
    casey
  • He's not Bill Hall. Bill Hall is currently hitting below .200. Yikes.
  • He's cheap: Casey is still under team control and won't take up much payroll for the next few years.
  • Casey McGehee can sneeze with his eyes open.

I like the guy!

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