20
Aug 09

So long Bill Hall, I will miss your super white smile

billhallsmile

Dear Bill Hall,

Well, it's been fun hasn't it? Milwaukee, I like to think, was pretty good to you. You were the only player on the team to get his own specialized chant (Bill clap, clap, clapclap, HALL, Bill...) which is a feat that may never be duplicated since the majority of fans only seem capable of doing the "Let's Go Brewers" chant. (Seriously, we can't do any better than that? Are we that devoid of creativity? Any chance "Less filling!", "Tastes great!" can come back?) You had that one amazing season which was a total fluke, but you got paid for it anyways. As time went on you got progressively worse and despite maintaining your excellent defensive skill you slipped to the point that your contract was the only thing keeping you on the team. It was sad to see as you were one of my favorites, but if you're not hitting it doesn't matter how much people like you. That's just the way it is. I always knew you had the goods, but something just didn't work. Were you trying to hit 35 homeruns on every swing? Because that's not you. You are more like a 20 guy. I am convinced that season was the worst thing that ever happened to you. Continue reading →


24
Jul 09

Miller Park Drunk E-Mail Show with Right Field Bleachers, Part 2

beermilwaukeeshirtPart one was a bit more by the book and with part two we had a bit more fun. If you aren't already doing so check out Right Field Bleachers, it's a lot like this site only with more writers, more photshopping and less pretend conversations. Good stuff.

MPD: Congratulations on making me gag myself. Once with the clam chowder analogy and a second time at the thought of Vicente Padilla in a Brewers uniform (hang on.... yep, this one just made me gag a third time). I think we're all at the point now where we are getting antsy for the Brewers to do something. Earlier in the season Melvin was quote as saying he wasn't sure if he needed a bat or a pitcher and I think it has become painfully clear to anyone with even the slightest of baseball knowledge (Tom Haudricourt comes to mind) what the team needs. We're well past the point of wondering if this team will make a move and now we are forced to sit and wait for it to happen. We've actually been (seemingly) waiting so long that it's gotten to the point where people are wondering if they might actually need two starting pitchers. I'm all about waiting for the right deal/player/trade, but come on already. People are dying out there!

You mentioned that you wouldn't mind seeing Corey Hart leaving in a trade and my kneejerk reaction is to say "well, who would replace him?" (Catalanatto is probably a better hitter, but a HUGE defensive dropoff. Gerut is the opposite.) At the same time the two easiest positions to fill on the field are first base and corner outfield. There are lots of bats out there that could step in and do close to what he's doing so I could almost see it. Almost. I'm just not convinced the team is ready to give up on him yet (which is weird considering all the grief he gave them in arbitration.) Does his popularity have anything to do with it? I don't know, but the more I think about Corey Hart, the more he reminds me of Jeff Francouer of the Braves. No great batting eye to speak of. Power to spare. Perpetually underachieving. Short flashes of brilliance. Ends up league average or worse. Hart is older, but he's like Francouer in that he was a lot better two years ago. Hart's improved his walk rate quite a bit this year (which could easily come back to Earth), but so did his strikeout rate went up too and it's come at the cost of some power (which could easily not come back to Earth). I am not sure if he's ever going to be much better than he was in 2007 and considering his first half of 2008 was likely a serious outlier, maybe dangling him out there is the right move. If the team can get some value for him now, why not? Sure, a few thousand female fans would be upset but they had to have figured out he wasn't really attractive at some point right? I don't know if Corey Hart gets you Ian Snell of the Pirates or Erik Bedard of the Mariners. I really just don't know, but I'd like to see Doug try and figure that out. I suspect even the Moustache hates hearing that at-bat music three times a game.

Forget Hart for a second though, let's talk about another can't miss Brewer: Mat Gamel. He only spells his name with one T so you know he's bad ass. I understand (and love) that Casey McGehee has been playing out of his mind for the past month, but can this dude get more than one start in a week? He's shown flashes and in my arm-chair-scout-who-has-no-idea-what-he's-talking-about opinion his at-bats have improved since he first came up quite a bit. He deserves an honest shot out there before they switch McGehee into virtually full time 3B mode. Give him two weeks of starts, then we'll talk. It's all I ask really because I think Gamel could be one of the next great Brewers and he should be out there playing. Or if the team sends him down, it should be to practice right field in preparation for him finishing the season there. Where do you stand on the send him down/keep him up argument and where do you see him going in the future as a Brewer? Continue reading →


18
Jun 09

Straight outta the funny pages

One of the most popular Cubs blogs online is Bleed Cubbie Blue (I've always found it annoying that it has the same initials as Brew Crew Ball and that they are both on the SBNation). One thing I like about Bleed Cubbie Blue is that they have their own semi-regular comic strip. After reading the latest one I thought to myself "self, why not us? Why can't MPD have it's own comic strip?" What I realized is there is absolutely no reason why not. So I hung some fliers at the laundromat and got myself a comic artist. We don't have quite the budget that SBNation does so the quality might not be the same, but I like to think what we lack in artistic quality we make up for in creativity.

brewerscomic

(click for larger version)


02
Jun 09

Creative ways to use the Milwaukee Brewers new texting service

In case you haven't heard the Brewers have added a new service for fans to report people behaving badly. All you have to do is text them and they'll take care of it. I think this is a great service and would hate to see it abused by some fans. That's why we're here with...

YOUR GUIDE TO TEXTING THE MILWAUKEE BREWERS

  1. When texting the Brewers, please spell everything correctly. "drnk n 125 no sht on yllng" will get you nowhere.
  2. Don't use the texting service as a way to get in touch with Brewers players. "JJ: 36/24/36, call me 414xxxxxxx" will not be accepted.
  3. No lols. This one hurts me, but it's true. We can't have lols in texts. So "dude just punched out cub fan in rf lol!" isn't going to cut it. Sorry.
  4. No texting after 2AM. Nothing good ever happens after 2AM.
  5. If you see The Happy Youngster feel free to make something up about him and text it.

I'm pretty interested to see how this turns out. It could easily turn into a case of he said/she said and there are a lot of people out there who are simply too easily offended. The only thing I'll say about it for now is this: use it to your advantage, get The Happy Youngster thrown out of games.


04
May 09

Enough with the gimmicks people

Let's do things a little differently today. I am going to show you a few pictures and you can decide for yourself how you feel about them. Then when we are done with that, I am going to tell you exactly how I feel about them. Sound good? Good.

banana asshole

gorilla assholes

keg asshole(Thanks to StB08 on Twitter)

bunny asshole

Now, taken one at a time these people could be considered funny, cool or at the very least creative. I give them kudos for their creativity and enthusiasm. However, I seriously doubt their intentions. When you are dressing up like this, you aren't going to the game to watch the team play. You are going to the game to get attention. Of course these people want the Brewers to win the game, but what REALLY makes them happy is for people to give them high-fives and say "Oh man, I love your costume." And you know what? I am not going to do it. I am not going to give them the adulation they so desperately seek. They are attention whores. Plain and simple. The only attention whores I like are the ones who double as regular whores too.

Every single series I go to I end up seeing more and more of these people. They multiply like someone poured water on Gizmo's back. I'm not saying I want to live in a world where these people don't exist. Like my mom used to tell me, every family needs a big, fat, stupid idiot. The thing is there are far too many of these people out there right now and if someone doesn't say something now this may spin out of control. To the point where every game starts to look more like a costume party at Elton John's condo than a baseball game.

So here I am saying it: cut it out. You hear me guys in the gorilla outfits? That can't be comfortable and this isn't a freaking Phoenix Suns game. You hear me banana guy? I honestly don't even understand what you are going for there. You hear me rabbit head? (Actually, you probably don't. That head looks pretty thick.) This is a BASEBALL game, you are here to watch BASEBALL. Save your furry fantasies for the bedroom. I swear to you that you can have fun at this place without dressing like that. SO STOP IT.

(None of the above applies to shave stuff in your chest guy. Don't ever change my friend.)

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