10
Mar 11

A Guide to Recognizing Your Brewer Injuries

This week we all learned about Zack Greinke's basketball related injury that will keep him out for 4-6 weeks and delay his Brewers debut by a few weeks. It isn't the end of the world, but at the same it's not exactly what we had in mind for our new superstar and it sucks. What sucks even more is that Zack Greinke isn't the only Milwaukee Brewer currently experiencing an injury. In fact, there are quite a few of them and it's getting to the point where it's hard to keep up with all of them. That's why we decided to do the Milwaukee Brewers Universe a favor and create a comprehensive guide to all the aches and pains currently ailing the home town team. What can we say? We aim to please. Continue reading →


16
Jun 10

The last days of Prince Fielder and Corey Hart?

I can't seem to turn on the internet machine without seeing pictures of cute kittens something about Corey Hart and Prince Fielder being traded from the Milwaukee Brewers. Every baseball writer, analyst, talking head and fan thinks that it's important for the Brewers to trade Prince Fielder and Corey Hart. Right now. Corey, because he's hot and will never be hotter (which apparently people who are paid to evaluate talent won't realize, haha suckers!), and Prince because he's good and he's probably not going to re-sign with the team when he becomes a free agent in 2012. This has a certain amount of logic to it and if the Brewers get the right deal then they should probably do it, but I would beĀ  really surprised if one or both was traded during the season.

The reason I believe this lies in the fangraphs post from today by Jack Moore titled "What the Milwaukee Brewers Should Do" (which is weird because it never actually says what they should do), in the post Jack writes:

the contracts of Jeff Suppan, Trevor Hoffman, Bill Hall, David Weathers, Jody Gerut, Craig Counsell, Claudio Vargas, Jim Edmonds, Dave Bush, David Riske, and Gregg Zaun coming off the books, the Brewers will clear around $45 million in salary for next season. If Fielder and Hart are traded, that would be another $15 million cleared. The Brewers will see some raises for arbitration eligible players, but they should have a lot of money to play with in 2011.

Jesus, the Brewers are paying more people not to be with them than Larry King.

With all that money coming off the books as is, there is no need to get Prince and Corey off the books. If the goal is to build this team for a run in 2011, a run that they are totally capable of making, then there is no rush to trade two of the team's best three hitters unless they bring back someone who can significantly help them now. I'm talking a top of the line starter with arbitration years left. I'm talking Yovani Gallardo: the squeakquel.

Trading away Prince and Corey because of the team's poor play this season in return for prospects that won't help this team win next year is a stupid, stupid decision and guess what? Doug Melvin knows that. He'll listen, but he needs to be blown away and I'm not sure there's anyone out there willing to blow him away. At least not during the season. It's why he's a good GM.

/dodges tomatoes


07
May 10

Miller Park Drunk vs the Brewers bullpen

I am the biggest optimist who writes about the Brewers on a regular basis. Every post I write either says "relax" or "calm down" or "save some of that glue for me to sniff". I don't think the Brewers are this bad. I don't think Doug Melvin did a bad job of putting this team together. I didn't think they would play this poorly and against LA they kind of proved me right. I'm an optimist and I believe in this team. At least I believe in most of it.

Last night's loss sucked, but even the loss itself wasn't enough to send me over the edge. What sent me over the edge was this story from Adam McCalvy that featured these gems of information:

Hawkins said his command has eluded him in all but his first two outings this season, and now his velocity is gone, too.

Here's what I don't understand about this. If you don't think you have good control and you don't have good velocity (and honestly, you should be able to tell when you're in the bullpen warming up) shouldn't you tell somebody? Shouldn't you say, "hey maybe someone else should take the ball today. We have a chance to win and I don't have my best stuff." I always warn my girlfriend when I don't have my best stuff (and she's just an inanimate blow-up doll of Precious from the movie Precious (Based on the novel Push by Sapphire).)

You have a GUARANTEED contract for the next two years, it's not like you have to prove yourself to make the money. (Just ask David Riske.)

Trouble is, Hawkins' best pitch has not been very good of late. He was pumping 96 mph fastballs with ease during his four scoreless outings to begin his Brewers career, but on Thursday he didn't top 91 mph.

Once again, things that could have been brought to someone's attention YESTERDAY!

"You can make mistakes if you throw hard enough. You can't make mistakes at 88-90 [mph]," Hawkins said. "If I knew what it was, I'd tell you and I'd fix it. ... It definitely doesn't put your mind at ease, that's for sure."

And this right here is what completely sets me off. "You can't make mistakes at 88-90 mph". Do you know who makes mistakes at (not 90) (not 88) eighty six mph? Our closer, our ace reliever, TREVOR HOFFMAN! Continue reading →


18
Feb 09

The Reliever starring Eric Gagne

April 10th 2008. 6:30 PM. Top of the 8th inning. The Cubs and Brewers are tied 3-3.

[Eric Gagne starts to walk towards the bullpen door, but David Riske stops him.]

David Riske

DAVID RISKE: Eric, you don't have to do this. I'm here. I'm really here. What do you call that?

[Guns N' Roses "Welcome to the Jungle" starts to play.]

Eric Gagne

ERIC GAGNE: Hey, you hear that? This is where I belong. Gotta go.

[Eric Gagne exits the bullpen and heads towards the mound.]

David Riske

DAVID RISKE: (crying) No. Eric! ERICCCCCCCCCC!

Brewers Fans

FANS: (groan) Ugh.

[Gagne makes his way to the mound, but instead of throwing the customary warmup pitches he calls for a microphone.]

Eric Gagne

ERIC GAGNE: I just want to say to you all tonight I'm very grateful to be here. A lot of people told me that I'd never pitch again and that's all I do. You know, if you live hard and play hard and you burn the candle at both ends, you pay the price for it. You know in this life you can loose everything you love, everything that loves you. Now I don't hear as good as I used to and I forget stuff and I aint as pretty as I used to be but god damn it I'm still standing here and I'm a reliever. As times goes by, as times goes by, they say "he's washed up", "he's finished" , "he's a loser", "he's all through". You know what? The only one that's going to tell me when I'm through doing my thing is you people here.

Brewers Fans

FANS: (Lukewarm applause.)

[Eric Gagne gives up homerun on the first pitch.]

Eric Gagne is back!

ERIC GAGNE: I'm an old broken down piece of meat and I deserve to be all alone, I just don't want you to hate me.

kid-flipping-bird

FANS: BOOOO!

[throw trash]

[riot]

[get really drunk]

[fall asleep]

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