10
Jul 09

Friday Quick Hits

mannyPretty big series coming up with the Dodgers, but I guess they are all big when you're in a playoff. We should think of a different way to describe this. Difficult series ahead? I mean, it's considered a big series because the Dodgers are good and beating them will be difficult. Either way, I'm nervous about it with Mike Burns being prominently involved (at least he is facing Jeff Weaver, I think the over and under for this game is going to be in the teens). After this it's the All-Star break where our very own Ryan Braun and Prince Fielder will be participating. I'm looking forward to Prince in the Home Run Derby, but also secretly holding out for Russell The Muscle to appear. That'd be sweet. Anyways, here's a few quick hits to get you ready for the weekend.

  • What is the deal with the national anthem at Miller Park? I went to a game this week and started to cheer before the song ended and was greeted with dirty looks. Ummm, what? I'm of the belief that people should go absolutely crazy during the national anthem (like at this Blackhawks game). It's called patriotism. Especially when the person singing it is an Elvis impersonator. I mean, that's just science. Wake up people.
  • Speaking of the game I went to this week I did a bit of live tweeting it on twitter. Say what you want about twitter, but if you're not following us you're missing out on tweets like this: "strangest game ever. i just saw two girls make out and a guy in a vikings favre jersey." Or pics like this (his friend was wearing a Mandarich jersey.) I don't smoke, but all these things happened on the smoking deck. I feel like this means something, but I'm not sure what exactly. Twitter, it's a good time.
  • Speaking of social media, guess who searched out Miller Park Drunk and became a fan of us on facebook?trenni
    TRENNI KUSNIEREK! I wonder how she feels about me making fun of her buddy A-Dub all the time. Anyways, if you haven't already follow Trenni's lead and become a fan of us on facebook. We even have the spiffy facebook.com/MillerParkDrunk URL.

  • I meant to mention this earlier in the week, but Right Field Bleachers has video of a Remetee event at decibel. So many things to say about this video. Douchebag levels are off the charts. Someone needs to delete this video ASAP, if Kim Jong Il sees this he's sending a missle to Milwaukee tomorrow.
  • Do me a favor. If you go to the games this weekend, ask Manny Ramirez if he wants to play spies.

That's all I got. We'll be back Monday with some cool stuff to keep you occupied when there are no games going on. As for this weekend series? I'd be okay with 1-2, excited for two wins and absolutely ecstatic for a sweep. Honestly, I'm more concerned about the games coming up after the break against the Reds, Nationals, Pirates, Braves and Padres. Those are the ones we NEED to win.

Have a good weekend everybody.


16
Jun 09

The fail that is the JSOnline Brewers Fan Photo Gallery

If you haven't had the pleasure chance to see the JSOnline's user submitted Brewers fan photo gallery than you are REALLY missing out. I've invited my good friend Brewers Baby to help me comment on some of these photos.I should warn you, Brewers Baby can get a little vulgar at times. What can I say? He's a baby. He poops his pants and pees himself. Babies are stupid.

afflic

BREWERS BABY This is a good look for someone who wants to A) look like a douchebag, B) cook crystal meth, C) date strippers and D) get his f@%kin ass whooped if I ever see him.

Continue reading →


17
May 09

The Happy Youngster is a douchebag who makes us all look bad

Surely, by now you have heard the story about the Brewers fan catching Chris Coghlan's first career home run ball and then holding it for "ransom". If you haven't here's a quick rundown of it.

Coghlan's home run was caught Wednesday night by a Milwaukee Brewers fan who refers to himself as "The Happy Youngster" and claims on his blog to have caught nearly 50 homers.

And while Coghlan said the fan was willing to give the ball back, the man's original asking price was a lot higher than the Marlins rookie outfielder anticipated.

"He wasn't the most polite or respectful guy about the whole process," Coghlan said Thursday. "He told me he goes around a lot and catches these balls and holds them for ransom — even though he doesn't say that he does, it seems that way."

Sounds like a real winner, right? I guess there is a part of me that can admire someone who wants to get game balls. If a ball is hit to my area, I go for it. At the same time, I don't wear a glove. Why? Because I am not 12 years old. I have never caught a ball in my life so maybe I SHOULD wear a glove so that I can position myself and be ready. Maybe I should quit tailgating and show up inside for batting practice. Maybe I should start wearing the opposing team's hat and jersey to the games so that they will see me as a fan of them and throw me balls. Hey, maybe I should stop going to games to watch baseball and have fun. Maybe I should just go to them strictly to get balls, then I could have thousands of balls and I could hang out with other people who don't even really like baseball! Then me and my new ballhawking friends could go to spring training and I could make a diving catch that I didn't really even need to dive for to add to my pathetic collection so that I could be on SportsCenter! Then I could start a blog and write about how much a frickin' loser I am! Then I could meet a nice girl and settle down, well settle down as in get laid for once in my life, train her to be as pathetic as I am and have a kid who I will pass my douchebaggery gene onto!

Or maybe I could continue how I am going and continue to be a real fan of the baseball team that I like. Go to games to watch them and not to make myself into some sort of pseudo-celebrity. I think Al said it best when he said "Again, this "fan" simply embarrasses all Brewers' fans, not to mention all police officers and, well, all human beings." It's a complete joke, yet this is the world we live in. People think they are entitled to things just because they bothered to show up. Good for you, you caught this guy's home run ball. You don't deserve anything for it. If I am your dentist do I keep your daughter's first tooth? When you ask someone to take a picture of you and your friends, do they ask you what will you give them for it? If you found someone's lost dog, would you ask them for two puppies and a kitten to give it back? Absolutely not. It's called basic human decency. The odds of being a professional baseball player are pretty slim, the odds of getting to play in the Majors are slimmer and to hit your first career home run is basically the culmination of a lifelong dream. He might never hit another home run, he could get beaned tomorrow and never play baseball again. You don't know, anything could happen. To give up this ball, that is worth basically nothing in the real world to anyone but him, should be an honor and a pleasure. Instead, it's a negotiation about what you think you DESERVE for being in the right place at the right time. F. U.

Here's what I think everyone should do when they see this guy. Report him. If you read his blog it's clear that he is often not in the seats he is supposed to be in. So when you see him, tell the usher to check his ticket. When he does his "ball trick" in the bullpen? Tell someone. You're not supposed to be doing it. I have absolutely no problem with getting people thrown out of a game if they are a douchebag and it's pretty clear to me that this is the biggest douchebag at Miller Park (even when the Cubs are in town.) So screw him, get him out of there. The last thing you want as a fan is someone making you look bad. This guy makes us look bad just by waking up in the morning.

To summarize - I don't like this guy. I don't like his kind. Ballhawks, to me, are the worst kind of fans. They are a joke, but do you know what pisses me off more than ballhawks? This girl.

youngstergirl

Here I am writing a beloved blog for all the true fans touching on the hot topics of the day. Making people laugh, making people think, making people talk and most of all helping people enjoy the life of being a Brewers fan. Yet, the guy who goes to game and collects balls is the one selling t-shirts to attractive 20-something med students? Are you kidding me? THAT guy is making money off being a Brewers fan? The guy who wears different team apparel to every game? ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?

You know what? That's okay. Two can play this game. Introducing the first Miller Park Drunk t-shirt.

fff

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08
May 09

Famous Cubs Fans

With the Cubs coming into town today, I thought it'd be a good time to look at famous Cubs fans throughout history. This is a team with a rich history of fandom that needs to be appreciated.

The pictorial of some of the more famous Cubs fans is after the jump. Continue reading →


20
Apr 09

A word about Brewers fans

drunk-fightBugs and Cranks with a piece about how both Cubs and Brewers fans are douches, but on Opening Day 2009 the Brewers fans were the bigger douches. Normally, I would come to the defense of such an article but at this time I agree completely. Most of the "Brewers fans" I saw on Opening Day weren't Brewers fans at all. They were fans of being drunk and obnoxious more than anything. I can honestly say that there were more Brewers fans to annoy me on Opening Day than Cubs fans. Now, for once in my life there was actually more Brewers fans there than Cubs fans but the point stands. Below are some of the complaints that Cubs fans have issued and my responses to them.

  • Relentless verbal attacks (colorful language) on both young and elderly fans.

Not sure how I feel about this one. I am not the biggest fan of swearing in general, especially around kids, but Cubs fans are THE WORST at this so I don't really care to hear it.

  • Gesturing and taunting of pre-teen female Cubs fans to perform sexual acts.

Come on.

  • Throwing items.

Definitely not a fan of this. If someone's throwing stuff have them thrown out. It's not that difficult, in fact it's kind of fun.

  • Pouring beer on fans/down their shirts.

This is just wrong. Who would waste beer? They cost $6.75!

  • Tampering with vehicles.

Not cool.

  • Dumping charcoal ashes in front of Illinois plated cars.

Not cool.

  • Pieces of broken beer bottles placed under cars and tires.

Seriously, how old are you? That doesn't even work.

  • One fan reported being intentionally cutoff in their vehicle.

Really? Someone from Illinois is going to complain about driving? Really?

Here's the thing, Cubs fans are going to act like douches. There is no denying it, it's just a fact of life. You don't really have to do anything to entice them into douchery, it just comes naturally. Here's a great example, on Saturday my friends and are I were in our seats when in front of us this drunk lady looking like she just stepped off the set of a Larry the Cable Guy movie started screaming at these Cubs fans sitting next to us about how bad these guys sucked. Now, the whole game these Cubs fans were quiet and polite never stepping into the idiocy we tend to associated with Cubs fans. My friend decides to tell this lady to shut up because A) it's annoying and B) she believes that as Brewers fans we shouldn't stoop to doing stuff like that (ie like Cubs fans do). An argument insued and this lady ended up losing rather badly, but basically she came to the defense of these Cubs fans. So what happens? Soriano hits a home run in the ninth and they IMMEDIATELY turn into douchebags. This wasn't like someone turning into a zombie after a bite, this was like the moon rose and they were instantly transformed, like were-douches. Did this cause us to regret it? No, it didn't. The fact still remains is that we don't do stuff like that in Milwaukee because we aren't the dumb ones.

And you know what? Despite all these complaints listed above (and I am sure there are many more) I still saw more Cubs fans thrown out of Miller Park last weekend than Brewers fans. The Cubs fans may outnumber us and at times they may even be louder than us, but we should accept that as long as they don't out-douche us. Forget taking back Miller Park, we need to give back the douche. I'd rather be outnumbered, out yelled, out drunken and everything else than an asshole.

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