10
Feb 11

2011 Milwaukee Brewers Bobbleheads: No Gallardo, lots of grit (and white people)

The Milwaukee Brewers recently released their 2011 promotional schedule and along with it came the announcement of who would be getting a bobblehead. There are a few surprises, Randy Wolf when almost everyone thought his signing was a bust (it wasn't, but that's the belief out there) is one great example, but no head scratchers. Unless you count Craig Counsell who had a OPS+ of 76 last year and hasn't once been a starting player unless there was an injury, but there are reasons for him beyond statistics. There are reasons for everyone really.

Date Bobblehead Expected Reason
April 24 John Axford Doug Melvin's rule that at least one Canadian get a bobblehead. Also, white.
May 22 Casey McGehee JS MVP, white.
June 12 Zack Greinke Duh.
July 10 Hot Dog Whitest of all racing sausages.
August 14 Craig Counsell Is named Craig Counsell. Also, white.
September 25 Randy Wolf Brewers had to get their $30 million worth somehow. Also, white.

A lot of people have a problem with these selections because there is a disturbing lack of the "good" Brewers. No Prince or Braun for the 85th time, no Rickie Weeks or Corey Hart who had huge seasons last year and no Yovani Gallardo who has actually never had a bobblehead made in his likeness by the Milwaukee Brewers. It's weird right? It reminds of 2009 when Jason Kendall got one over Mike Cameron despite being worse in every way. To find the answer I went to another blogger who seems to be an expert in these things. I use the term "blogger" lightly because his blog isn't actually up yet and he only has a twitter account, but on this particular topic I think he knows his stuff. So take it away, KuKluxBrewKrew. Continue reading →


02
Dec 10

What are they gonna do? Plan #2: Do nothing

What are the Brewers going to do this offseason? Who knows? Doug Melvin has seemed non-committal whenever he's asked about anything and nobody else is talking. Prince Fielder is yet to be traded. Rickie Weeks is yet to be re-signed. Eric Hinske chose the Braves over the Brewers. The Braves! What does it all mean? Did the top stop spinning at the end?

I don't claim to know what they are going to do or even what they could do, but I can idly speculate. That's why we're bringing you the series: What are they gonna do?

Doing nothing is what it has felt like the Brewers have done since CC Sabathia left. Sure, some of the players have changed, but the team has been basically the same. Seth McClung turned into Todd Coffey. Dave Bush turned into Dave Bush. JJ Hardy turned into Alcides Escobar. Mike Cameron turned into Casey McGehee. My 36 waist turned into a 38. The improvements have been minimal, if not non-existent, and the team has remained basically the same.

Of course, we are basically talking about two seasons here. Two seasons that were littered with bad luck, two seasons that might have gone better if pitchers could have hit their projections and two seasons where they didn't come close. Braden Looper had probably the worst season of his career. Manny Parra somehow managed to get worse at baseball, but somehow handsomer. Jeff Suppan was born. The only contribution Doug Davis brought to the team was looking like a douchebag. These weren't the best teams ever fielded, but they weren't as bad as they ended up. They should have been better. So maybe it's time for luck to be on the Brewers side. Maybe it's time to do nothing.

What would a "do nothing" team look like? Continue reading →


30
Nov 10

What are they gonna do? Plan #1: Go All In

What are the Brewers going to do this offseason? Who knows? Doug Melvin has seemed non-committal whenever he's asked about anything and nobody else is talking. Prince Fielder is yet to be traded. Rickie Weeks is yet to be re-signed. What does it all mean? Did the top stop spinning at the end?

I don't claim to know what they are going to do or even what they could do, but I can idly speculate. That's why we're bringing you the first in a series: What are they gonna do?

Going for it is the plan that pretty much all Brewers fans want to see. Screw the future, we want to win. You would put up with four 90 loss seasons if it resulted in one World Series win (I doubt this), you wouldn't even complain about it (I highly doubt this). After getting a taste of the playoffs and winning baseball a couple of years ago (three years, really?) we have been starving for more ever since, kind of like your sister after that one time. We want to win. The Cubs sucks. The Astros suck. The Cardinals aren't unbeatable. Let's do it. Let's go for it all. Now.

What would the Brewers have to do to make this sort of thing a reality? Well, I would imagine it would look like this:

  • Keep Prince Fielder
  • Don't trade anyone from the current roster unless that person is Carlos Gomez
  • Trade Jeremy Jeffress, Brett Lawrie, Mat Gamel and every single player it would take for Zack Greinke
  • Offer Cliff Lee twenty five million per season
  • Offer Brandon Webb a 1-year contract loaded with incentives that could see him make $15 million, possibly with a player option for 2012
  • Settle on overpaying Carl Pavano
  • Sign Rafael Soriano or Grant Balfour to three year $30 million contract

This would give the Brewers a great rotation, solidify the bullpen even more while maintaining the core of the offense. They would be, undoubtedly, the favorites to win the National League Central and probably at least an 8-1 bet to make the World Series. This would be the very definition of "going for it". So what's the problem? Continue reading →


06
Oct 10

Ken Macha out, Bob Brenly in?

In the most unsurprising news since your mom drunk dialed me last night, the Milwaukee Brewers decided not to retain the services of Ken Macha. Those of you who wished for his firing will be disappointed to know that he wasn't actually fired and his contract simply wasn't renewed. On his last day Doug Melvin and Gord Ash even helped him pack. The Ken Macha era ends not with a bang, but a whimper and every rose has it's thorn.

What can I say about the guy that hasn't already been said? I didn't like Ken Macha for awhile, but then I did. Now I like him and he's fired. Baseball is funny like that. I don't think he did anything to deserve getting fired (besides manage a team with a bad record), but he was hired to win and whether or not it was his fault that they didn't doesn't matter because they didn't. (Got that?) He could have made Gallardo pitch underhanded, batted Prince leadoff and changed the team uniform to Remetee if he won, but he didn't win so he's gone. It doesn't matter if he did a good or bad job because all that matters is the results. Ken Macha knows this:

"There's a lot of people who don't necessarily merit getting a promotion or getting fired. That's just the nature of this game. Do I think that I merited this? I don't know. Did I merit getting the job in the beginning? I'm not sure. That's just how things work out in baseball. That's the game. That's the business."

It is what it is. The next guy will come in and we will like or dislike him for awhile and then he'll be gone.

2010 was a bad season and someday had to pay. They blamed the pitching coach last season, it was Macha's turn. On to the next one.

Now, what if I told you that the Brewers were going to hire a former WORLD SERIES winning manager? That's what we need right, a winner? Somebody who has won before and knows how to do it again? A no-nonsense manager who has the experience and tools to succeed, that's what this team needs and that's what this team is looking to get.

Unfortunately, the man Doug Melvin has (allegedly) chosen to (possibly) do the job is Bob Brenly. Continue reading →


17
Jun 10

The ultimate guide to Ryan Braun

We love the Milwaukee Brewers and despite popular belief we love Ryan Braun. No, really, we really do. We've gotten heat in the past because of the way we have portrayed Ryan Braun and for good reason. Whether it's his Lake Geneva restaurant, his Milwaukee restaurant, his t-shirt line, being single, sticking his tongue out, his comments about the pitching last season, LikeMe.Net or anything else, we've gotten a reputation for not liking Ryan Braun. You have to realize that this all just isn't true, I love Ryan Braun. I would sleep with Ryan Braun if I had to. He's my one of my favorite Brewers. It makes me excited that I get to see him play.

Looking at that history I realize that I've probably written about Ryan Braun more than any other Brewer and that I really know a lot about Ryan Braun. I know why he's great, I know why people like him and I know why people don't like him. I might be the world's foremost expert in Ryan Braun and if watching Spiderman has taught me anything it's that girls nipples look great when their t-shirt gets wet. Oh, and something about responsibility. I feel that I must share this knowledge with the world to better educate you in all things Ryan Braun because if I don't, who will? Continue reading →

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