22
Mar 13

Jeff Suppan to run for Congress if he continues to suck at baseball (Or Jeff Suppan to run for Congress)

In a surprising turn of events, former Brewers pitcher Jeff Suppan is still trying to pitch in the major leagues. When the Brewers released Jeff Suppan in 2010jeff suppan (Keyboard Cat, never forget) many wondered if that was the end of his baseball playing career, but he ended up pitching for the Cardinals that season. After that most of us assumed that he would retire to his California restaurant, the cleverly named "Soup's Sports Grill", but he actually ended up playing 2011 for the Royals AAA Omaha team (where he sucked) and then spent part of 2012 getting rocked in San Diego. (Although he did lead the Padres to a win over the Brewers last season which proved once and for all that baseball is unfair and that God doesn't care about the Brewers.) For a guy with a career that should have been over three years ago, Suppan has kept on pitching and continued to make a high six figure salary for sucking at his job.

Which makes him a perfect candidate to run for political office. Continue reading →


28
Jul 11

“He’s going to be out awhile” is Roenicke speak for the season is over

We don't know much right now. We don't know exactly what's wrong. We don't know how long he'll be gone. We don't know who will replace him. All that we know is that Rickie Weeks got hurt tonight and the sky started falling.

Maybe it's just a sprain. Maybe he won't be out for long. Maybe his 15-day DL stint is just that and the Brewers won't skip a beat. I want to think these things. I want to believe these things. Yet I can't shake the image I saw tonight. Rickie Weeks, the man who takes fastballs to the face and laughs it off, the man who stands in the middle of the plate like Happy Gilmore at the batting cages just for kicks, the toughest of all the Brewers; laying on the ground unable to get up and stand on his own feet. His season flashed before my eyes and with his season went the Brewers season. There will be no playoffs for this team. The Brewers' season is over.

(Hang on a second. How am I doing? Does it sound like I'm really shaken up? Do you think I'm giving up on the season because Weeks got hurt? Are you buying this?) Continue reading →

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