24
May 12

Earl Weaver vs Ron Roenicke

This might come as a surprise to you, but I like baseball. I like watching baseball, I like playing baseball video games, I like talking about baseball and I like reading about baseball. One of my favorite baseball books of all time is Earl Weaver's Weaver on Strategy.

For those of you that haven't read it (read it) or don't know much about Earl Weaver let me tell you a little bit about him. He managed the Baltimore Orioles for seventeen seasons carrying a .583 winning percentage and only finishing with a losing record once. His Orioles team won six division championships, four American League pennants and one World Series. He was also ejected from over 90 games and is 5'6" tall. (That last thing doesn't really have anything to do with anything, I just like to point out when famous people are shorter than me.) He did all this in the pre-Wild Card era in the AL East. He was really great and I don't understand why every manager isn't forced to study his book like 1999 Vince studied Sable's issue of Playboy.

Watching Ron Roenicke manage it is clear that nobody ever forced him to study it and he's probably never even read it. (In Ron's defense it's not like his brother had the best years of his career playing under Weaver or anything. Oh wait...) This is strange because I've always had the feeling that the way Earl Weaver managed a team and the way Doug Melvin built are a team are nearly identical. Weaver's managerial philosophy was "pitching, defense and the three-run homer" and if that doesn't sound like a team Doug Melvin would like to build I don't know what does. (I say would like to build because the scars of Yuniesky Betancourt are still fresh.) Unfortunately for Doug somewhere along the way things got crossed up and he hired (another) manager who doesn't follow Weaver's 10 Laws. Instead he employs someone who breaks at least five of them on a daily basis. This is not good, but the good news is that the answers are RIGHT THERE ON AMAZON.COM and all Roenicke has to do to better himself as a manager is to read this book.

Or this blog post. Either way. Continue reading →


14
Sep 09

Meet the new boss, much cooler than the old boss

neweditor

WAZZUP BITCHEZZ????

Welcome to the NEW and IMPROVED Miller Park Drunk. I'm Chad and I am the new boss (and yes that is me bombin' two Old Styles at once,WHAT). Your prolly thinking "why is this dude in a Cubs jersey who can drink two Old Styles at a time and is obviously a pimp buying a site called Miller Park Drunk? Well, if there is one thing I have learned in my life it's that you don't have to like the Brewers to get drunk at Miller Park! Heck, you don't even have to like baseball! In the history of Miller Park the best drunks have ALWAYS come from Chi-town.

look at me i'm the old editor, i'm a stupid faget

"look at me i'm the old editor, i'm stupid"

For real though, I been reading this website for awhile and thought it was pretty frickin' funny. I just knew that I could make it better. How? By making it about the Cubs, DUH!!!! So I took some money out of my trust fund and gave that idiot who was running it an offer he couldn't refuse (fifty bucks, a 12 pack of Milwaukee's Best and the issue of Playboy with Sable from WWF.) You Wisconsin folk are so simple.

Things are gonna be a bit different around here now. First order of business is to make up for all the dumb stuff this idiot said before. Like who doesn't like a good retro jersey? My prized possession is my autographed Sosa jersey. I'm not supposed to wear that just because he's not on the team anymore? BITE ME MILLER PARK DRUNK! Did Paul Moliter ever hit 60 homers in a season? Didn't think so! How about Robin Yount? No? I CAN'T HEAR YOU!

Anyways that's enough for the day I gotta head down to the Cubby Bear for a little pregame before the Cubs WHOOP some Brewers ASS tonight. That's right, Ryan Braun does my taxes. I'll be the dude in the autographed Sosa jersey sipping on Old Style. If you see me come say whats up and maybe I'll give you a little tug off my flask. Jack Daniels? YOU DAMN RIGHT JACK DANIELS.

Tomorrow we should have some more awesome, way better than before stuff including a VERY SPECIAL GUEST WRITER who I think kicks total ass and more stuff that kicks ass. Have fun watching the game tonight, I know I will.

PREDICTION: Cubs 17 Brewers 1. Theriot hits for the cycle.


17
May 09

The Happy Youngster is a douchebag who makes us all look bad

Surely, by now you have heard the story about the Brewers fan catching Chris Coghlan's first career home run ball and then holding it for "ransom". If you haven't here's a quick rundown of it.

Coghlan's home run was caught Wednesday night by a Milwaukee Brewers fan who refers to himself as "The Happy Youngster" and claims on his blog to have caught nearly 50 homers.

And while Coghlan said the fan was willing to give the ball back, the man's original asking price was a lot higher than the Marlins rookie outfielder anticipated.

"He wasn't the most polite or respectful guy about the whole process," Coghlan said Thursday. "He told me he goes around a lot and catches these balls and holds them for ransom — even though he doesn't say that he does, it seems that way."

Sounds like a real winner, right? I guess there is a part of me that can admire someone who wants to get game balls. If a ball is hit to my area, I go for it. At the same time, I don't wear a glove. Why? Because I am not 12 years old. I have never caught a ball in my life so maybe I SHOULD wear a glove so that I can position myself and be ready. Maybe I should quit tailgating and show up inside for batting practice. Maybe I should start wearing the opposing team's hat and jersey to the games so that they will see me as a fan of them and throw me balls. Hey, maybe I should stop going to games to watch baseball and have fun. Maybe I should just go to them strictly to get balls, then I could have thousands of balls and I could hang out with other people who don't even really like baseball! Then me and my new ballhawking friends could go to spring training and I could make a diving catch that I didn't really even need to dive for to add to my pathetic collection so that I could be on SportsCenter! Then I could start a blog and write about how much a frickin' loser I am! Then I could meet a nice girl and settle down, well settle down as in get laid for once in my life, train her to be as pathetic as I am and have a kid who I will pass my douchebaggery gene onto!

Or maybe I could continue how I am going and continue to be a real fan of the baseball team that I like. Go to games to watch them and not to make myself into some sort of pseudo-celebrity. I think Al said it best when he said "Again, this "fan" simply embarrasses all Brewers' fans, not to mention all police officers and, well, all human beings." It's a complete joke, yet this is the world we live in. People think they are entitled to things just because they bothered to show up. Good for you, you caught this guy's home run ball. You don't deserve anything for it. If I am your dentist do I keep your daughter's first tooth? When you ask someone to take a picture of you and your friends, do they ask you what will you give them for it? If you found someone's lost dog, would you ask them for two puppies and a kitten to give it back? Absolutely not. It's called basic human decency. The odds of being a professional baseball player are pretty slim, the odds of getting to play in the Majors are slimmer and to hit your first career home run is basically the culmination of a lifelong dream. He might never hit another home run, he could get beaned tomorrow and never play baseball again. You don't know, anything could happen. To give up this ball, that is worth basically nothing in the real world to anyone but him, should be an honor and a pleasure. Instead, it's a negotiation about what you think you DESERVE for being in the right place at the right time. F. U.

Here's what I think everyone should do when they see this guy. Report him. If you read his blog it's clear that he is often not in the seats he is supposed to be in. So when you see him, tell the usher to check his ticket. When he does his "ball trick" in the bullpen? Tell someone. You're not supposed to be doing it. I have absolutely no problem with getting people thrown out of a game if they are a douchebag and it's pretty clear to me that this is the biggest douchebag at Miller Park (even when the Cubs are in town.) So screw him, get him out of there. The last thing you want as a fan is someone making you look bad. This guy makes us look bad just by waking up in the morning.

To summarize - I don't like this guy. I don't like his kind. Ballhawks, to me, are the worst kind of fans. They are a joke, but do you know what pisses me off more than ballhawks? This girl.

youngstergirl

Here I am writing a beloved blog for all the true fans touching on the hot topics of the day. Making people laugh, making people think, making people talk and most of all helping people enjoy the life of being a Brewers fan. Yet, the guy who goes to game and collects balls is the one selling t-shirts to attractive 20-something med students? Are you kidding me? THAT guy is making money off being a Brewers fan? The guy who wears different team apparel to every game? ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?

You know what? That's okay. Two can play this game. Introducing the first Miller Park Drunk t-shirt.

fff

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27
Apr 09

Boo

booOn Saturday we had to make a drive up to Appleton and back. This coincided with the broadcast of the Brewers game and I ended up listening to 9 1/2 innings of the game on the radio. To me, this is the great thing about baseball I listened to the whole thing on the radio and didn't feel like I missed a thing. During the game Pudge Rodriguez was ejected and then his manager was as well for arguing balls and strikes. For the rest of the game the fans booed every single ball and strike call that didn't go in their favor. At one point Uecker even commented that fans were booing a ball that was six inches off the plate which led him to say "these fans are going to boo the babysitter when they get home." I wasn't watching the pitches, but the way Uecker made it sound was rather ridiculous and this got me thinking about booing and how much I generally hate it.

When the Brewers were last home I went to a game against the Reds where Manny Parra was pitching. Parra was a little bit off that day(!). He walked one in the first inning, then gave up a double to score a run. In the second inning, he gave up a double and fans started to boo. He got out of it. Then in the third he gave up a walk followed by a two run homer and the fans REALLY started to boo. I turned to my friend and wondered aloud why they were booing as it was, you know, THE THIRD INNING and they were only down 2 runs. He then threw the next three innings scoreless. At the end of the day Parra gave up three runs and notched his only quality start of the season.

Thinking of this brought to mind a quote I heard from Jason Kendall on the pre game about "knowing which guys need a pat on the back and who needs a kick in the butt". As fans we want our team to do better. We dislike things that happen on the field, but is booing your own team really the best way to address this? I don't think so, let Kendall and Macha handle the "kick in the butt."

Think about it like this, you are at work. You do something wrong. What would you prefer to happen: A) your boss is nice about it, B) your boss says nothing, C) yelled at or D) booed by all your co-workers. Obviously, your answer is A or B and if you like someone you should always do A or B. So why when it's your favorite team at your home ball park do you go with C and D?

Here is a list of acceptable times/people to boo:

  • The Yankees are in town and Alex Rodriguez is batting: No explanation needed.
  • The umpires strike zone is actually all over the place: You are only allowed to boo, however, if it is clear to you. Don't be like those jackasses in Houston and boo any pitch you don't like. My seats are on the third base line and with a right handed batter up, I can't see the plate so I never question balls and strikes and you shouldn't either.
  • A former player returns and was a jerk and/or sucked the whole time he was here: Examples being Eric Gagne, Jose Hernandez, Jeff Suppan if he ever leaves and Bill Sharp. (feel free to add more in the comments if you'd like)
  • Another team is obviously throwing at the Brewers: This is the fans way of saying "Hey, f-you stop doing that and if you keep it up our team will come after you, but we don't really want them to because players involved in brawls get suspended and we can't really afford to lose Prince or Braun for a few games so stop doing that."
  • There is a fan in the stands being an asshole and someone stands up to them. Then the nicer fan is thrown out along with the asshole or the asshole stays.: You know what I'm talking about, this happens all the time. (I love when people are thrown out by the way because it leads to my favorite moment of fan interaction, fans singing the "nanana hey hey goodbye song" love that.)
  • An obvious call was blown by an umpire: This could be a home run, double play, someone was called safe when they were clearly out, anything.
  • Roseanne sings the National Anthem.

And that's just about it. Did you see any situation herein where you boo players on your own team? (You didn't.) The reason they are home games is because the people like the team that is playing at home and the team likes playing at home. When the team is booed, they'd rather be in Philadelphia and nobody should ever want to be in Philadelphia, ever. Seriously, Philadelphia sucks.

Stop booing the Brewers. It's annoying and stupid.