Why Miguel Cabrera is an a-hole

Off-Base October 5th, 2009

miguel-cabreraLast week I did a playoff preview where I went through each team individually and tried to pick a favorite (and it looks like I'll be an honorary Coors Field Drunk for the rest of this month). I went through each of the playoff teams and decided that the Tigers were going to win the division. The Twins had something like a 5% chance of coming back and I didn't think they would do it. Here's what I said.

(Skipping the Twins. They aren't coming back.)

That's it. I didn't even feel the need to justify it and now they are in a one-game playoff for the AL Central title to be played tomorrow.

(Quick tangent on this: Each year the MLB holds a series of coinflips in the event of tiebreakers to decide the home team. The Twins won this coinflip. (As lar pointed out in the comments this has been changed, but the overall point still stands.) Now, why wouldn't the MLB look at the schedule and say "You know, we want these tiebreakers to take place on Monday. We don't want either team gaining an advantage and we want the playoffs to start on Tuesday. Even though you won the toss, if you can't have that game on Monday, we're going to have that game on Monday in Detroit. Sorry." How hard would that be? The playoffs take forever as it is, why add a day because Brett Favre unretired?)

So, the Tigers play the Twins in a four game series and they split it when everyone says the Twins need to win 3 of 4 to have a chance. Then they sweep the Royals while the Twins fall apart against the White Sox. WHY? Why does this happen? I don't really care about either team at all, but I don't like to be wrong. Who likes to be wrong? Who is responsible for me to possibly be wrong? Miguel Cabrera, that's who. Read the rest of this entry »

Brewers Baby returns to make fun of people who post their pictures on a newspaper’s website

Fans October 2nd, 2009

Yesterday I made fun of some of the people who read the JSOnline and just a few minutes later I got a sternly worded letter from my good friend Brewers Baby who was pissed off at me for stealing his thunder. "Making fun of the twats that read the Journal Suckinel is MY territory MPD," he said. I realized that he was correct and now turn the site over to him.DanandMickey-1

BREWERS BABY The good news is I will never have to play with the kids of these toolboxes. Why? Because who in their right mind would bang these losers. I thought Cervecerros day was for Latinos, not D&D nerds. There is no chance that these guys don't jerk off to The Guild.

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What are these people smoking?

Fans October 1st, 2009

Dumb Brewers fan in a Favre Brewers jerseyJust checked out the always enjoyable for all the wrong reasons Anthony Witrado chat from last week and seriously, what is wrong with you people? Are you stoned? I do not like Anthony Witrado, this is well known, but I am starting to think that A-dub is just Charles Manson and the people who participate in these chats are the ones out killing people. Look at some of these questions, it is not pretty.

Q: Michael, Chicago - Thanks for all of your hard work this season Anthony.

Work? He's talking about the time he spends in the mirror adjusting his hat sideways right?

Q: stu pidasso, westallica - hi anthony. just for fun, let's pretend you're doug melvin.

WHY? WHY DO YOU THINK THIS WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA? I've got a better one. Let's pretend you are David Carradine. Here's a belt.

Q: Justink8996 - Do you guys have an update on Alcides "baby mama" drahma? Kinda hard to root for a guy who is a dead beat dad? Guess it would be pretty awkward as a journalist to even ask him about it? "Oh Alcides by the way...." Read the rest of this entry »

Who ya got? 2009 MLB Playoffs

Baseball September 30th, 2009

Red Sox Yankees BaseballWell, you aren't going to believe this but after last night's loss to the Rockies the Brewers have been eliminated from playoff contention. Even if the planes carrying the Dodgers, Cardinals, Rockies and Phillies crash into eachother the Brewers still won't make the playoffs. Sad, I know.

Anyways I just found out that the playoffs still happen if the Brewers don't make it and despite the Brewers not being in contention they will still hold a "World Series". I am interested in this and plan to watch these "playoffs" until their logical conclusion which I assume is called the "championship", I don't know I'm new to this whole baseball thing. I only started watching the Brewers last year. Since the Brewers aren't involved I thought we should figure out who we all want to root for and pretend that we were fans of this team for the next six months until the playoffs end. So let's get down to it. Read the rest of this entry »

Miller Park Drunk Grill Walk 2009

Fans September 29th, 2009

Once a website or a person gets a certain amount of success and influence in the world, they tend to want to give back to the community (unless they're a real asshole). You see this all over the place. Actors, musicians, bloggers, all doing stuff for free and the proceeds going to a worthy cause. I think that I've reached the point in my career where it's my turn to give back to the community, but what should I give back to? Cancer? Been done. AIDs? Done. Homelessness? No thanks.

You see when I give back, I want it to be something that really matters to me. Something near and dear to my heart. Something like... tailgating, but how do I give back to tailgating? Well, let's have my dear friend from Wisconsin Sports Tap explain. Read the rest of this entry »

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