What are these people smoking?

Fans October 1st, 2009

Dumb Brewers fan in a Favre Brewers jerseyJust checked out the always enjoyable for all the wrong reasons Anthony Witrado chat from last week and seriously, what is wrong with you people? Are you stoned? I do not like Anthony Witrado, this is well known, but I am starting to think that A-dub is just Charles Manson and the people who participate in these chats are the ones out killing people. Look at some of these questions, it is not pretty.

Q: Michael, Chicago - Thanks for all of your hard work this season Anthony.

Work? He's talking about the time he spends in the mirror adjusting his hat sideways right?

Q: stu pidasso, westallica - hi anthony. just for fun, let's pretend you're doug melvin.

WHY? WHY DO YOU THINK THIS WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA? I've got a better one. Let's pretend you are David Carradine. Here's a belt.

Q: Justink8996 - Do you guys have an update on Alcides "baby mama" drahma? Kinda hard to root for a guy who is a dead beat dad? Guess it would be pretty awkward as a journalist to even ask him about it? "Oh Alcides by the way...." Read the rest of this entry »

Tom H’s JSOnline Chat

Baseball May 12th, 2009

Yesterday Tom "I hate my job" Haudricourt did a chat at JSOnline. He answered a lot of questions, but he didn't have time for all of them. Luckily, Tom H and I are tight (we listen to goth music together) and he allowed me to put the questions and his answers that they didn't have time for right here on Miller Park Drunk!

Q: mary anne, milwaukee - tom are you on facebook, myspace or twitter?
A: Tom Haudricourt - Why don't you check out my FaceBook profile and find out? Oh that's right I am not an idiot like you who uses FaceBook or MYspace. Go tweet yourself.
Q: milwaukee fan - You are an awesome writer and I love Tony as well. Just a quick question: what color is the sky?
A: Tom Haudricourt - Thanks so much. We do our best around here, we like to think of ourselves as the Woodward and Berninstein of Milwaukee. To answer your question: depends what day.
Q: Mark, Eau Claire - Tom: I was wondering if you could tell me how Braun's first three years thus far compare to some of the other great baseball players. It seems like he's right up there with Pujols and other legends.
A: Tom Haudricourt - I have neither the time or the desire to research such things.
Q:
miranda, appleton
- tom are you single?
A: Tom Haudricourt - That's really none of your business, but if I was I wouldn't date some loser Brewers fan who reads my chats.
Q: Jack, New Berlin - Tom, I love the Brewers and I love going to Miller Park but the coverage that you and Tony deliver is beyond atrocious. I now get all of my Brewers information from blogs even though I'd prefer it from the JSOnline. Is there any chance of your editors realizing how bad you are and replacing you with better reporters? Or will the JS continue to stick it's head in the sand and act like everything is alright?
A: Tom Haudricourt - I'm glad they let you use the internet at the school for the mentally challenged, retard. Maybe if you knew anything you'd know that I am the best this stupid city will ever have.
Q: brewcrew4eva - Tom I hate Ryan Braun, Rickie Weeks, Mike Cameron, Prince Fielder and Yovanni Gallardo. Is there anyway the team can just clone Corey Hart and Craig Counsell and have them play every position?
A: Tom Haudricourt - No, but there is probably about 100 different ways you can kill yourself. Go try a few.
Q: Jack, New Berlin - Hey Tom me again. How do you think the Brewers will handle Capuano's return from the DL? Julio seems sure to go, but Cap is most valuable as a starter I'd think.
A: Tom Haudricourt - Go f yourself.
Q: Bill, La Crosse - Non Brewers question: Do you think the Cubs will turn it around and start being the team people thought they'd be in the preseason? Also, will the Dodgers still be good without Manny?
A: Tom Haudricourt - I'm paid to cover the Brewers, not the rest of baseball. Please don't waste everyone's time with this. Okay, that about wraps it up. It's not like I'm getting paid by the hour here. See you guys at the ballpark. (Actually, I won't because I'll be in the press box and you'll be in the upper deck.)

Thanks Tom!

The JS hilarity continues

Baseball March 26th, 2009

The A-Dub chat the other day speaks for itself, but this latest from Tom H has me seriously scratching my head.

You-know-who loves to provide links and quote blogs and other internet sites to ostensibly support his madness. Why do you think he didn't pass this one along to you folks? Isn't it interesting that he ignored this "source?"

And I'll pass along this bit of information that was not included in the mlb.com story to which I linked. Melvin was so upset about the baseless Peavy rumors that he called San Diego general manager Kevin Towers to let him know that the rumors weren't coming from the Brewers' end. I know that for a fact.

So, if the Brewers and Padres actually had been talking about Peavy, why would Melvin call Towers to make sure Towers knew that the baseless rumers weren't coming from Melvin?

And, this time I absolutely promise, on a stack of bibles, that this is my last word on the Peavy rumors. Between myself and you-know-who, only one person is right. And I think the rest of you know who that is.

I have almost 200 blogs on my Google Reader and I have no idea who "you-know-who" is. Reading the comments I think that he might be talking about one of the commenters, cauleys. Which is so beyond ridiculous that I wish it wasn't true. Do you really think Doug Melvin is bothered by a commenter, really?

The JS is a million dollar operation. Between the cheapshots, name calling and now dedicating posts to rogue commenters it's getting to be kind of embarassing. To quote a story from the future where the team is struggling "Where is the accountability?" There are thousands of people who would take these idiots jobs in a second and whoever their boss is needs to realize this. These guys are not irreplacable and even if they have incriminating photos of you, whatever blog they write for in the future will be so bad nobody is going to see them anyways.

Is Tony Gwynn starting to panic or not?

Baseball March 5th, 2009

I'm confused. The headline in the Journal Sentinel reads "Injured Gwynn isn't hitting panic button - yet". Then the first line of the article reads:

"I'm starting to panic," the Milwaukee Brewers centerfielder said Tuesday, looking up from his chair with honesty slathered on his face.

So, is he starting to panic or not?

Seconds later, realizing how brutally candid he had just been, Gwynn reeled that statement back and said he was more like "extremely concerned."

Try to relax though, Tony. If you can get healthy and make the team, you're set. You'll be the top pinch runner and late inning defensive replacement. If you can't, you're most likely to get picked up by your dad's Padres or a team that will actually give you a real live starting job, something you will never get with the Brewers unless two or three guys get hurt at once. So, take it easy TGJ. The world is your oyster.

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