04
Oct 12

One sixty two and 131

I don't know why exactly, but I liked the 2012 Milwaukee Brewers more than I liked the 2011 Brewers. I can't explain it.

The success of last season probably helped, I believe they could do it more this year because they almost did it last year. They should have done it last year, so they will do it this year. That was the logic at least. I'm sure Ryan Braun's ordeal had something to do with it too. I've always liked Ryan Braun as a baseball player, but the offseason really made me defensive over him as a person. When someone says "u kno braun failed that test cuz he had dat herp rite dude?" it pisses me off. SHUT THE HELL UP, I say. ("but d00d i kno this chick and she like has it too and she boned him" they'll say, but I won't listen because people who know people who openly, almost proudly say that they have STDs and brag about having sex with celebrities are not to be trusted. They are frickin' nutso.) He said he didn't, we should believe him. He said he didn't do anything wrong, we should believe him. He was cleared of the charges, we should drop it. ET CETERA. Plus, the general newness of the roster probably helped a lot too. Everybody likes playing with new toys. Japanese outfielder? I always wanted one of those! Thanks mom!

Whatever the reason I liked this team a lot. A lot, a lot and they repaid me by breaking my heart. Thanks for that one guys. Continue reading →


03
Nov 09

Hey Ryan Braun, let’s make a movie!

Ryan Braun loves him some offseason projects. He doesn't want to be a baseball player. He wants to be Coke, he wants to be Pepsi, he wants to be Chevy, Ford and BMW. Ryan Braun isn't just an All-Star, he's a brand. The name Ryan Braun equals quality and it reaches far beyond the baseball field. Whether it's Ryan Braun's Tavern and Grille, RB8 or Remetee, he sets out to do good things. I like Ryan Braun, he impresses me.

Why should he stop here? He needs to just keep getting bigger and bigger. Obviously the next logical step is movies and boy oh boy, do I have the perfect movie pitch for you Ryan Braun. You want to be a movie star? You want to extend your brand? You want to get laid about 15,000 times more than you do now? Well, I've written you a screenplay that will BLOW YOUR MIND and surely become one of the top box office hits of 2010 (that's right, we're fast tracking this baby!) I have the story that's going to take Ryan Braun from "Major League Baseball Star" to "Bigger than Jesus, Babe Ruth, Leonardo DiCaprio and 80's Michael Jackson combined". I have the idea that is going to make Shaq and his movies like, well, Shaq movies. Are you ready for this? Are you ready for....

ryan braun jew commando

When a group of Neo-Nazi's seek to re-animate Hitler and kill all the famous Jewish people in the world, there's only one man who can stop them and his name is Ryan Braun.

It's time for this Jewish All-Star to deliver some suffering of his own - with a baseball bat!

Call me.


30
Sep 09

Who ya got? 2009 MLB Playoffs

Red Sox Yankees BaseballWell, you aren't going to believe this but after last night's loss to the Rockies the Brewers have been eliminated from playoff contention. Even if the planes carrying the Dodgers, Cardinals, Rockies and Phillies crash into eachother the Brewers still won't make the playoffs. Sad, I know.

Anyways I just found out that the playoffs still happen if the Brewers don't make it and despite the Brewers not being in contention they will still hold a "World Series". I am interested in this and plan to watch these "playoffs" until their logical conclusion which I assume is called the "championship", I don't know I'm new to this whole baseball thing. I only started watching the Brewers last year. Since the Brewers aren't involved I thought we should figure out who we all want to root for and pretend that we were fans of this team for the next six months until the playoffs end. So let's get down to it. Continue reading →


17
Aug 09

Steroids or Why it’s good to be a Brewers fan

muscle_building_steroids4I don't give a crap about steroids. I really, really don't. It annoys me when people talk about them. It annoys me when I have to read about them. It drives me crazy to read hack after hack talk about how baseball isn't pure anymore and that things will never be the same and blah, blah, blah. Every week a former star comes out and says he "did it the right way". (By the way, do you know why you did it the right way Joe Morgan? Because you didn't have a choice! 268 career home runs is pretty impressive for a guy your size, but 400 would be a lot nicer wouldn't it? Exactly.) Only a few like Daryl Strawberry admit that they would have done steroids. Unfortunately Daryl would have also huffed cans of Pam, smoked roofies and shared jankem with Keith Hernandez if given the chance. It just goes on and on and very few times, if ever, do you read something where the writer is logical and even handed.

Bill James is the most recent example of someone using logic and he makes some good points. He basically says that science doesn't stop and that we will continue to have drugs in our society that help us live longer and stay young. Staying young means staying good at baseball and it will only get better in the future and one day we will look back on this time and think "no big deal." He then goes on to say that most people will live to be 200 years old, have 24-hour boners and that a method of time-warp will be developed that will attract the attention of an advanced alien race called Vulcans who will then make first contact with Earth. So he's mostly right, except for the part about the Stargate and flying cars.

The thing is none of it really matters. Continue reading →

  • BrewBay

    1994 TOPPS FINEST  7 CARD LOT   Milwaukee Brewers   Bill Wegman  Jaime Navarro
    1994 TOPPS FINEST 7 CARD LOT Milwaukee Brewers Bill Wegman Jaime Navarro
    US $3.99
  • Brewers Tickets

  • E-Mail Miller Park Drunk