20
Sep 12

Norichika Aoki needs some help to win Rookie of the Year

I am going to say something right now that a lot of Brewers fans might not be prepared to hear: Norichika Aoki is not going to win the Rookie of the Year award this season. He won't even be close.

Bryce Harper is a lock for the NL Rookie of the Year award. Bryce Harper is hitting .262/.333/.459 and playing center field (well) on a playoff team as a NINETEEN YEAR OLD. That's kind of amazing. When I was 19 I listened to Kid Rock and worked in a warehouse. I spent all my money on DVDs and alcohol. I was a complete loser with no direction and no hope for the future. It was kind of like now, but I didn't have a cool blog and my girlfriend was less attractive and kind of a weirdo. (Take that, life.) There was no way I could have ever been a starting center fielder in the major leagues. Even if I had the talent that I genetically lack, I still wouldn't have been responsible enough to handle what Bryce Harper is doing right now. What I am trying to say is I hate Bryce Harper. He's better at life than me so screw him.

On the other hand Norichika Aoki is 30. He's hitting a slick .293/.362./.438 that actually makes him a better hitter than Bryce, but he plays right field and his defense is worse. There are a lot of arguments to made that Norichika Aoki is a better player than Bryce Harper this season and that is a very good argument to make. Besides the homerun category Aoki is better or close in nearly every statistical category. Continue reading →


26
Apr 10

Monday Mailbag: Zaun, Weeks, JJ and Cubs fans

Welcome to a new semi-regular feature here at the site, the Monday Mailbag. I figure if Anthony Witrado can get 500 questions at the JSOnline I should be able to get at least 5-10. If you're sad you missed out, we'll be accepting questions through our Facebook page or our twitter account on Mondays semi-regularly throughout the season.

This might end up getting long so I am not going to waste any more time and just get right into the questions.

What are the comparison stats between Zaun (Brewers) and Kendall (Royals) so far this season?
-Wendy

Depends on how you look at it, if you look at it purely on better average then Kendall is the much better player.

Batting Average
Kendall: .318
Zaun: .157

But if you include counting stats that actually matter in the box score, then it's a lot more even. That is to say, they both suck. Continue reading →


20
Oct 09

Witrado’s Quest: The Final Act

The slow news days have begun and due to MLB rules there is only a playoff game once every six days. What do we do? Inspired by our favorite site The Dugout, we've decided to follow our favorite JSOnline writer Anthony Witrado on a quest. A quest to find love, adulation and respect in a cruel world that doesn't understand him or particularly like him. Will he find what he's been seeking? Or will he fail at it, like he's failed at life so many times before? Find out in Witrado's Quest: A Miller Park Drunk Event.

In part one Anthony learned that his fellow writers at the Journal Sentinel were not fans of his. In part two convinced that they were the only ones, Anthony set off to find someone who liked him at Miller Park only to be met with more failure and a cross-dressing Doug Melvin. In part three Anthony blamed the state of Wisconsin instead of his own shortcomings and headed back to his home in California where his favorite team was playing a meaningful game, but he found that Hollywood celebrities and the Dodgers did not like him either. With nowhere to go he returned to Wisconsin looking for answers. Continue reading →


02
Oct 09

Brewers Baby returns to make fun of people who post their pictures on a newspaper’s website

Yesterday I made fun of some of the people who read the JSOnline and just a few minutes later I got a sternly worded letter from my good friend Brewers Baby who was pissed off at me for stealing his thunder. "Making fun of the twats that read the Journal Suckinel is MY territory MPD," he said. I realized that he was correct and now turn the site over to him.DanandMickey-1

BREWERS BABY The good news is I will never have to play with the kids of these toolboxes. Why? Because who in their right mind would bang these losers. I thought Cervecerros day was for Latinos, not D&D nerds. There is no chance that these guys don't jerk off to The Guild.

Continue reading →


02
Jul 09

It Takes Two

Brewers Yost Baseball

I wanna trade right now
I'm Doug Melv and I came to get down
I'm not internationally known,
but I'm known to rock the trade phones
Because I get stoopid, I mean outrageous
Stay away from me, if you want Gamel
Cause I'm the winner, no, I'm not the loser
To be a G.M., is what I choose a'
Players love me, fans adore me
Even the ones that never saw me
Like the way that I traded for King
The reason why? Man, I don't know
So, let's go cause

mark a

It takes two to make a trade go down,
It takes two to make it outta sight

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