12
Mar 10

Ryan Braun’s restaurant is now hiring

I have friends. One of my friends is Tyler Maas. He pointed out this ad for Ryan Braun's restaurant on craigslist. It seems that Ryan Braun's new Waterfront restaurant is getting rid of all their old, ugly staff and replacing them with new, hot people. You should read his post on the matter. He nails it. Here's the ad:

Now, another one of my friends is Craig, Craig List. You may know him as the owner/creator of craigslist. I contacted him about this ad and he told me that this is actually the second draft of this ad as he said he couldn't post the first ad. I got to thinking, how bad could the first ad have been considering this is the same site that often advertises porn casting couches for sale and personal ads for WoW nerds. So I emailed Craig back and he gladly sent me over the original copy of Braun's employment ad. Read at your own risk. Continue reading →


27
Oct 09

Ryan Braun’s Tavern and Money Pit

moneypitI've heard so many rumors that Ryan Braun was opening a restaurant in Lake Geneva for so long that I just assumed that it was true. (Kind of like Rod Stewart having his stomach pumped.) I've know about this for awhile, but didn't want to post about it just in case it wasn't true. One day the sign out in front of the restaurant was changed to say "COMING SOON BRETT FAVRE'S STEAKHOUSE" which was funny, but also made me think that there was no way it was Braun's place because no way he'd think of something that funny. Well, it all turned out be true and yesterday news started to trickle out about it, topped off by the great Adam McCalvy doing a full write up. In the write up McCalvy says:

A group of investors led by Madison lawyer Patrick Sweeney finalized a licensing deal with Braun and Major League Baseball this month. The group is spending more than $1 million on upgrades to a former Mexican restaurant at 430 Broad St. in Lake Geneva, a resort community about 50 miles southwest of Milwaukee's Miller Park, and the idea is to open for business within 6-8 weeks.

And then:

He got a first-hand look at the progress of the restaurant on Sept. 6, the same day Braun and his teammates executed their now-famous celebration of Prince Fielder's 12th-inning home run that beat the San Francisco Giants.

Now I've worked in and around restaurants for most of my life and if there is one thing that has been said at each and every establishment that I have been fired for drinking from it's this: "The most expensive seat in a restaurant is an empty seat." With the idea being that you can have the best service, best food, stiffest drinks, the sluttiest waitresses and everything else in the world, but if there is nobody there to eat it the restaurant will fail. By their own doing this restaurant has had it's door closed since September and all summer long before that. Why? To spend over $1 million on upgrades to a place that wasn't that messed up to begin with. Of course. Continue reading →


07
Aug 09

Astros? More like Ass-tros, am I right?

stupid cowboyMan, it must suck to be an Astros fan. Right now they are probably like "Oh man this series is huge! We're only 5 out in the Central and after we sweep this series we'll be right back in the thing!" and then high five their buddy and go drink some sarsaparilla. Whatever the hell that is. Then he goes out to his grandma's house because she can't figure out why the antenna on her tee-vee doesn't work.

Oh, who am I kidding? There are no Astros fans. The only people at the game tonight are going to be former Presidents and Mexicans who traveled across the border to see Yovani. And oil men.

I feel pretty good about this series. Beating the best team in the league will do that for you. The Astros are not that good. We are good. Maybe Prince losing his shit was the thing that this team needed to wake up from their slumber. If that's the case I am happy he did it. Even if it doesn't get Anthony Witrado fired.

Speaking of A-Dub, it should be noted that as of this writing 51 people liked my article about him being fired. We've never had over 40 people "like" anything before that. If that doesn't tell you that the guy needs to go, I don't know what does.

Anyways, I'm off for the weekend. Hopefully this rain stops soon and we can start drinking outside like normal people. Twitter. Facebook. You know the drill and Carl Pavano, if you are reading this. We didn't want you anyways. Jerk.

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