Tag Archives: mike burns

The Big Tuna will save us all

Posted on by

A few people out there aren't really happy with the Brewers pitching choices this offseason. The idea is that the Brewers haven't signed anyone that could be considered anything better than a #3 starter. While this has some truth to it, it's kind of a silly argument. What if the team broke the bank and got a "proven ace"? There would be no money left to get a second starter, which the team needed, and the team would be guaranteed to come out of the spring with Suppan starting (and if someone got injured Mike Burns or Chris Narveson). That's not a good plan. We don't want Mike Burns ever starting for us again unless we are playing softball at Helfaer Field. Furthermore, let's say that last season someone offered you this trade:

Mike Cameron, JJ Hardy, Jason Kendall and Seth McClung for:

Carlos Gomez, Gregg Zaun, Latroy Hawkins, Randy Wolf and Doug Davis

I mean, even a Mike Cameron fan like myself, a 13 year old saving herself for JJ or the most diehard Slipknot fan would think that's a good trade right? I'd hope so because that is a good trade and it's exactly what Doug Melvin has pulled off. The team will go into spring training with basically the same payroll as last year with upgrades at between four and five positions (C, SP, SP, SS and RP(?)) with a drop off at only one (CF). That's a really good offseason. I honestly don't know how anyone could say that outside of the Mariners anyone had a better offseason than that and it's all because of the Big Tuna Doug Davis. Who knew?

THIS pitching staff wasn’t THAT bad

Posted on by

davebushhurtWhy do I do this to myself? Why do I read anything on the JSOnline, anything written by Anthony Witrado or anything someone paid Anthony Witrado to do? Do I hate myself? I read Anthony Witrado's last chat of the season and was constantly pissed off while reading it. People asking if Corey Patterson would be our 2010 centerfielder, Witrado fellating Lopez, Witrado saying that Braun or Fielder would net Halladay and just, well, everything. It was all bad. The thing that pissed me off the most though, was this quote from A-dub.

No manager in the history of the game could have taken this team to the post-season with the way the starting pitching was built. Nobody. As any manager does, Macha has fair criticisms, but he almost deserves and INC for this season because the tools weren't in the shed to properly live up to expectations. You will never win by hitting, alone. You NEED to be able to pitch. Some things people don't like can be pinned on Macha, but not that.

Apparently the Brewers had the worst pitching in the history of baseball this season and had no chance to compete. Which is funny when you consider that on July 1st they were in first place.

Now, I'm not saying that the pitching was good. It wasn't, but it was good enough to have them competing for the division crown at the halfway point of the season. It was good enough for them to be among the frontrunners in the National League Central and National League Wild Card races. Unfortunately, there were a few things didn't go their way. Continue reading »

Friday Quick Hits

Posted on by

mannyPretty big series coming up with the Dodgers, but I guess they are all big when you're in a playoff. We should think of a different way to describe this. Difficult series ahead? I mean, it's considered a big series because the Dodgers are good and beating them will be difficult. Either way, I'm nervous about it with Mike Burns being prominently involved (at least he is facing Jeff Weaver, I think the over and under for this game is going to be in the teens). After this it's the All-Star break where our very own Ryan Braun and Prince Fielder will be participating. I'm looking forward to Prince in the Home Run Derby, but also secretly holding out for Russell The Muscle to appear. That'd be sweet. Anyways, here's a few quick hits to get you ready for the weekend.

  • What is the deal with the national anthem at Miller Park? I went to a game this week and started to cheer before the song ended and was greeted with dirty looks. Ummm, what? I'm of the belief that people should go absolutely crazy during the national anthem (like at this Blackhawks game). It's called patriotism. Especially when the person singing it is an Elvis impersonator. I mean, that's just science. Wake up people.
  • Speaking of the game I went to this week I did a bit of live tweeting it on twitter. Say what you want about twitter, but if you're not following us you're missing out on tweets like this: "strangest game ever. i just saw two girls make out and a guy in a vikings favre jersey." Or pics like this (his friend was wearing a Mandarich jersey.) I don't smoke, but all these things happened on the smoking deck. I feel like this means something, but I'm not sure what exactly. Twitter, it's a good time.
  • Speaking of social media, guess who searched out Miller Park Drunk and became a fan of us on facebook?trenni
    TRENNI KUSNIEREK! I wonder how she feels about me making fun of her buddy A-Dub all the time. Anyways, if you haven't already follow Trenni's lead and become a fan of us on facebook. We even have the spiffy facebook.com/MillerParkDrunk URL.

  • I meant to mention this earlier in the week, but Right Field Bleachers has video of a Remetee event at decibel. So many things to say about this video. Douchebag levels are off the charts. Someone needs to delete this video ASAP, if Kim Jong Il sees this he's sending a missle to Milwaukee tomorrow.
  • Do me a favor. If you go to the games this weekend, ask Manny Ramirez if he wants to play spies.

That's all I got. We'll be back Monday with some cool stuff to keep you occupied when there are no games going on. As for this weekend series? I'd be okay with 1-2, excited for two wins and absolutely ecstatic for a sweep. Honestly, I'm more concerned about the games coming up after the break against the Reds, Nationals, Pirates, Braves and Padres. Those are the ones we NEED to win.

Have a good weekend everybody.

Ryan Braun has a funny way of inspiring people

Posted on by

Ryan+Braun+Darren+Hauck+AP

Hey, you. Mark Burns? I'm sorry, Mike Burns. Listen Mark, I want to talk to you about your pitching. It's not good. I'm just going to come right out and tell you right now that if Dave Bush comes back from the DL, I am sending you down to the minors. We're also looking into some trades right now and if we find the right fit, we will demote you. Just wanted to let you know.

Same goes for you too Seth. We probably won't release you or send you to the minors, but you're definitely out of the rotation. I won't have it. I might actually decide to trade you if you keep this up.  Just so you know, nothing personal. I just find you to be a terrible pitcher and don't really like you as a person. Nothing personal though.

Hey Mr. Mustache, are you going to make a freakin' trade or what? Do I have to do everything for myself around here? Get me some help. We can't spot every team four run leads. Seriously, how hard is your job? Pick up the phone and do something.

Prince, put that down. Don't eat that. Dammit man, we're All-Stars. Eat like one. I don't care if it's a veggie burger, Krispy Kremes are not buns.

What are you looking at Corey? Why don't you get a freakin' haircut and shave your face? You're a Milwaukee Brewer, not a Milwaukee Meth Cook.

Yo A-Dub, cool shirt. With that being said, learn how to write would you? You misspelled home run last week. I don't need that.

'Oh look at me, I'm Casey McGehee. I'm getting all these hits, but I can't even play the field.' Come on, man. Even I can play third base better than you.

Speaking of third base, where's Bill Hall? He better be in the batting cage so help me God.

Hey Jeff Suppan just wanted to congratulate you on pitching so well for the first time in your life. Great work.

You guys know what would be cool to have on our team? A pitcher that hits like a pitcher batting 8th. Oh wait we already have that. His name is Jason Kendall. Nevermind.

Macha take Willie with you and go get my dry cleaning. It's the least you could do to help this team.

Braun out.

50 Brewers related sexual innuendos

Posted on by

michael_scott2jpgLet me get personal for a second here. I love, like love love ))<>(( love love <3 love myspace love, sexual innuendos. I love saying that'swhat she said. Besides my friend Emily I probably say it more than anyone I have ever met. I just love them. Whether they are actually meant in a sexual way, just meant to be funny or just plain stupid, I love them. So why not combine two loves? Why not list a few of my favorite Brewers related sexual innuendos? Why not list ONE HUNDRED FIFTY of them?

Sounds like a plan. Continue reading »