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I don't know why exactly, but I liked the 2012 Milwaukee Brewers more than I liked the 2011 Brewers. I can't explain it.

The success of last season probably helped, I believe they could do it more this year because they almost did it last year. They should have done it last year, so they will do it this year. That was the logic at least. I'm sure Ryan Braun's ordeal had something to do with it too. I've always liked Ryan Braun as a baseball player, but the offseason really made me defensive over him as a person. When someone says "u kno braun failed that test cuz he had dat herp rite dude?" it pisses me off. SHUT THE HELL UP, I say. ("but d00d i kno this chick and she like has it too and she boned him" they'll say, but I won't listen because people who know people who openly, almost proudly say that they have STDs and brag about having sex with celebrities are not to be trusted. They are frickin' nutso.) He said he didn't, we should believe him. He said he didn't do anything wrong, we should believe him. He was cleared of the charges, we should drop it. ET CETERA. Plus, the general newness of the roster probably helped a lot too. Everybody likes playing with new toys. Japanese outfielder? I always wanted one of those! Thanks mom!

Whatever the reason I liked this team a lot. A lot, a lot and they repaid me by breaking my heart. Thanks for that one guys. Continue reading »

Prime 9: Chillest Brewer Bros

Whenever I'm bored and can't find anything to watch on TV I always switch over to the MLB Network to see what's going on. Most of the time it's just a rerun of the previous night's highlights that gets old in about five minutes, but sometimes they show their original program Prime 9. It's essentially a countdown show that features lots of old footage and talking heads, but the talking heads treat the material with respect and the host isn't annoying. It's usually a fun time.

Unfortunately, it hardly ever features the Brewers and why should it? A list of the 9 greatest World Series moments ever shouldn't include the Milwaukee Brewers nor should the 9 greatest third basemen. As much as I love the Milwaukee Brewers I wouldn't exactly call our history "storied." But that doesn't mean they are without merit. Despite the lack of success I think the Milwaukee Brewers are by far the coolest team to follow in all of the land. The Yankees are like following Berkshire Hathaway, ollowing the Nationals is like following Nickelback and you'd have more fun following the wheelchair kid from Glee after the show ends than following the Cubs.

The Milwaukee Brewers aren't only an awesome baseball team that is going to be awesome again real soon (as soon as this season is over), but they are also a great time. Why? Because the Milwaukee Brewers always have some of the chillest bros in all of baseball on their squad and in honor of those bros we now present to you the 9 Chillest Brewer Bros of all time. Continue reading »

RIP 2012 Milwaukee Brewers

Well, the improbable has become the basically impossible and I am throwing in the towel on the 2012 Milwaukee Brewers playoff hopes. Notice I said playoff hopes and not the team itself? Yeah, that's how you do it. There is a lot of summer left with basically nothing to do so watching the Brewers is still going to be one of the cornerstones of my life until the season is over. I will still want them to win baseball games because watching my favorite baseball team win games is fun for me. I've never understood why some people take on the opinion that once a team is eliminated from the playoffs they should lose every game for the rest of the season to improve their draft pick. What fun is that? You people watch too much basketball. I'm not saying the Brewers should be adding pieces or not doing trades to improve themselves for the future, but if Yovani Gallardo is pitching and Ryan Braun is hitting then that can be a fun team to watch. You should want those guys to win especially if you, you know, have tickets to a game and want to have a good time. This isn't rocket science. This is rocket science:

It's okay to still like a baseball team that isn't going to the playoffs. If you don't agree just watch the Packers practice in sweatpants or whatever.

I really had high hopes for the 2012 Milwaukee Brewers and there has been nothing that happened this season to make me doubt those high hopes. Things simply didn't go their way. Their shortstop got hurt, their bullpen wasn't that good which was exacerbated by the fact that some of their better arms had to fill in for injured starting pitchers, a handful of players decided not to show up in April, John Axford had his wisdom teeth pulled and decided it would be fun to pitch like he was still in the middle of surgery and luck never once felt like it was on the Brewers side. A few breaks the other way and this team is right in the thick of it, but if I start agonizing over "what ifs" now I might start crying. WHAT IF ROENICKE DIDN'T GO MARCUM THEN NARVESON IN GAME 6 GUYS!? WHAT IF HE USED BEST RELIEVERS INSTEAD!? WHAT IF!?

/looks at unused NLCS game 7 ticket
/cries

Continue reading »

The Man They Call Zack

The bright spots in the 2012 Milwaukee Brewers season have been few and far between. There's Ryan Braun somehow being better without Prince Fielder or PEDs (joke!), there's George Kottaras' emergence as the premier lothario of Milwaukee, there was Jonathan Lucroy, there's Aoki and then there is... uhh.. hmm... Well, that's about it really. There is almost nothing to warm you up and think that everything is going to be okay. Nothing that makes you belive this team can turn it around. Nothing that makes you sit back and say "I love baseball. I love the Brewers." I mean, nothing besides Zack Greinke at least.

For the past month Zack Greinke has been everything we dreamed he could be two winters ago. He has been an unstoppable, sophisticated pitching robot sent from the future to strikeout batters and change the future for one lucky lady. Every fifth day has been like sex and pastrami at the same time for Brewers fans. He's already posted a 3.6 WAR (wins above replacement) compared to his 3.9 last season. He's in line for an All-Sta Game start and on the shortlist for Cy Young contenders. Zack Greinke has been surreal, god-like, amazeballs and every other word you can think of to describe extreme awesomeness. We should be absolutely living the dream right now. Strutting around town in our Zack Greinke shirseys listening to "You're The Best" by Joe Esposito on replay forever. We should be writing songs about him.

Zack!
The Man they call Zack!
We robbed from the Royals and he gave us some more,
He stood up to the man and he gave him what for.
Our love for him now, aint hard to explain,
The hero of Milwaukee,
The Man They Call Zack!

Unfortunately, that's not happening. Instead, Brewers fans who consider this season to be lost are calling for the Brewers to trade Zack Greinke and that gives me a sad face. See? :( Continue reading »

Blame it on the bullpen

I will not admit that this Brewers season is over because we're probably going to see a NL Wild Card that wins 85 games and that number does not seem impossible and I will not give up on the Brewers season because, seriously, what else am I going to do for the next three months? With that being said I will say that this season has still been incredibly disappointing, no fun and not at all what we thought it would be. But what did we really think it would be?

Vegas set the Brewers pre-season over/under win total at 84.5. They weren't ever going to be a team that ran away with the division. Did last season's 96-66 record distort our expectations? Probably, but we should always remember that team had +6 wins over it's Pythagorean record (or expected record) and was a league best 30-18 in one run games. Those are two things that are really hard to repeat. For the Brewers to make a return trip to the playoffs this year they once again need a lot of things to go right and thus far this season almost nothing has. This isn't a lack of "drive" or a team that doesn't "mentally have it", this is baseball. You play more games than any other sport and less teams make the playoffs than any other sport. A lot has to go right for any team to succeed.

Thus far they haven't succeeded and a lot of reasons have been thrown around as to why. Here are a few of the most popular:

  • Rickie Weeks. :(
  • Injuries, man. Injuries.
  • Not clutch.
  • Offense is worse than last season.
  • Randy Wolf.
  • The bullpen.

And while there have been a myriad of problems with this season there really is only one thing that has kept the Brewers from being "in it" and that thing is the bullpen. No, seriously, it's not Rickie Weeks. It's the bullpen. It's not injuries. It's the bullpen. That's it. Seriously. Continue reading »