19
Oct 09

Witrado’s Quest 3

The slow news days have begun and due to MLB rules there is only a playoff game once every six days. What do we do? Inspired by our favorite site The Dugout, we've decided to follow our favorite JSOnline writer Anthony Witrado on a quest. A quest to find love, adulation and respect in a cruel world that doesn't understand him or particularly like him. Will he find what he's been seeking? Or will he fail at it, like he's failed at life so many times before? Find out in Witrado's Quest: A Miller Park Drunk Event.

In part one Anthony learned that his fellow writers at the Journal Sentinel were not fans of his. In part two convinced that they were the only ones, Anthony set off to find someone who liked him at Miller Park only to be met with more failure and a cross-dressing Doug Melvin. Blaming the state of Wisconsin instead of his own shortcomings, Anthony headed back to his home in California where his favorite team was playing a meaningful game. Continue reading →


18
Sep 09

MPD Field Trip: Wrigley Field Part 1

gerutcameronThe thing that I love most about Brewers fans is their ability to travel. The Brewers can't go on a road trip without someone from Wisconsin taking their vacation around wanting to see them play. While other teams may have larger fan bases, the Brewers fans are as loyal as anyone. They're like really good stalkers. I like to travel with the team myself, but I prefer to spend my money on multiple games spread across the season as opposed to spending a lot on a single series. Another thing I love? Drinking. That's why I try to take the trip down to Wrigley for at least one game a year. I'm still traveling with the team, it doesn't affect my Brewer game budget and I can drink heavily. About a month ago I picked Thursday's 1:20 game as the perfect opportunity to make my annual trip and got four bleacher tickets because I wanted sun. My crew for this day was my buddy Oscar (Brewers fan) and two other buddies (Cubs fans). We all had the simplest of instructions, prepare to get legendary.

Continue reading →


10
Sep 09

Calling for the head of Ken Macha

ken machaI am not a person who blames a manager for the success of a team. The job of a manager isn't that hard and in the grand scheme of things he doesn't really have a huge effect on the team's results. It's not like people are sitting around saying "he batted Cameron fifth and Hart sixth, if he had just flip flopped them we wouldn't have lost 14-6 to the Nationals!" there is really only so much the guy can do. All he can really do is pencil people in and hope they do the job.

I don't blame Macha for this season. I blame injuries for this season. I can't think of one game that Macha has either won or lost. He is a basic, by the book manager and not all that different than Ned Yost. Before this week I really had no reason or desire to care if he was the team's manager or not. Now? Fire him.

Fire him, fire him, fire him, fire him. Continue reading →


05
Aug 09

You wanna act like a bitch? Prince Fielder gonna slap you like one

angryprincefielder

You think this is a game? You think this is a f@*&in game!? You oughta know better Guillermo. You were there, you were there when I punked out Manny Parra. What makes you think you'd be different? What makes you think you're special? I F@*&IN HATE MY DAD! How dare that reporter say that sh*t! You can make all your jokes about me being a vegetarian and not eating meat, but make no f@*&in mistake about it I will ruin you. I. Will. Ruin. You, Guillermo. You ain't nothin' to me. I eat pieces of sh*t like you for breakfast. I mean, what the f@*& am I supposed to do? I'm having the best motherf@*&in' season of my career and Braden Looper has seen as many homeruns as me! What am I supposed to do? We're under .500 despite having me and Braun killin' this sh*t. What is Prince supposed to do? I'm just supposed to sit here and let some punk from last year hit me? You want me to go up to Canada and play some bar league s0ftball so Eric Gagne can hit me too? Is that what this is all about? Punks from last season thinkin' they hard? Man, motherf@*& y'all.


17
Jul 09

A peek inside the Brewers bullpen

The Brewers are enjoying a comfortable 9-3 lead.

trevorhoffman Psst!
seth mcclung /walks Nix
trevorhoffman Pssst!!!
seth mcclung /wipes 2 liters of sweat off brow

Wha? Who keeps doin' dat? I be tryin' to pitch good.

trevorhoffman (whispering) It's me. Trevor.
seth mcclung Oh, hey boss. What can I do for ya?
trevorhoffman I need you to give up three runs.
seth mcclung Wha? Why? We need to win this one boss! We cruisin' to a victory!
trevorhoffman Don't worry about that, just give up this home run so the game will be a save situation.
seth mcclung Bu..bu.... but I wanted to be a startin again soon! I need to prove myself to Mr. Mancha!
trevorhoffman Listen Red, you're never going to be a starter again.
seth mcclung Why not?
trevorhoffman For one, you're not that good.
seth mcclung /walks Gomes
trevorhoffman See.
seth mcclung Aww hell that don't matter. Look at the rest of our staff.
trevorhoffman True, but you're also nature's mistake.
seth mcclung What in the sam hell is that supposed to mean?
trevorhoffman Your hair.
seth mcclung What's wrong with it?
trevorhoffman Don't play dumb I've seen you on Yahoo Answers.
seth mcclung Yeah, but there been lotsa good red headed baseball players.
trevorhoffman Like who?
seth mcclung Chris Shelton.
trevorhoffman /stares
seth mcclung Man, you got a creepy lookin' face. It looks like you stole it from a wax museum in the Dells.
Okay, what 'bout Bobby Kielty?
trevorhoffman Maybe in the California Penal League.
seth mcclung Steve Howe?
trevorhoffman Maybe in the Betty Ford League.
seth mcclung Doug Rader! He won 5 Gold Gloves!
trevorhoffman Yeah, but that was in the 70s when they used to pick the Gold Glove awards by who could do the Hustle and who could get the best quaaludes.
seth mcclung True. That certainly explains Mark Belanger, but whatta 'bout Wade Boggs? Great hitter, could drank 'bout 70 beers, hung out with Mr. Perfect, sex addict, used to record other players cheatin' to protect himself.

Wait, scratch that last one.

trevorhoffman Oh, would you just give up the home run already? You know you were going to anyways.
seth mcclung Fine.

/gives up 3 run bomb

trevorhoffman :o
toddcoffey /RUNS WILDLY
trevorhoffman Psst!!
toddcoffey STFU TREVOR I HEARD WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT RED HEADS

trevor time

Epilogue: Saves with a three run lead are stupid.

  • BrewBay

    Victoria's Secret PINK Milwaukee Brewers STRIKE 'EM OUT V NECK, SEXY, Med
    Victoria's Secret PINK Milwaukee Brewers STRIKE 'EM OUT V NECK, SEXY, Med
    US $19.99
  • Brewers Tickets

  • E-Mail Miller Park Drunk