19
Jun 14

The Endless Road Of Ryan Braun Hate

ATENCION: Miller Park Drunk is throwing a tailgate party. No, Miller Park Drunk is throwing the BEST TAILGATE PARTY in the WORLD. It's on Sunday July 27th and you can buy tickets. It will be amazing and you don't want to miss it. Click here for more info.

I thought we were over this, you know? Ryan Braun, he of the 18 missed games and "paltry" .837 OPS, was supposed to be over being the most hated man in baseball. It was a long time ago in the 24/7 news cycle/twitter age and he isn't the best hitter in baseball anymore. Heck, he's not even the best hitter on his own team anymore. People should really find something else to obsess over.

But not Kirk Gibson. Nope. The manager of the Arizona Diamondbacks still remembers 2011, when he was relevant and Braun was using PEDs to hit .500 when the Brewers eliminated the Diamondbacks. He won't forget that. That was his time to shine and Ryan Braun's drug use took that away. Or something. Who knows? All I know is that Kirk Gibson ordered the code red:

And it started up a bunch of this stuff: Continue reading →


22
Apr 13

The End of the World: An OOTP Diary

Last week saw the release of OOTP14, the latest in Out of the Park Developments excellent baseball simulation series, and ever since then I have been playing it. The game is a definite upgrade from last season, but also I played as the Yankees, I played as the Pirates and I played as the Braves, but I never played as the Brewers. The reason is simple: I don't know what the hell is going on with them or what to expect from them. The scoreless streak, the winning streak, Yovani's DUI and the basic roster construction just don't make a lot of sense to me and I don't know how to make this team better. OOTP Doug MelvinSo how do I manage that team? Do I call up Hunter Morris, DFA Alex Gonzalez and/or Yuniesky Betancourt and ship Axford out of town? Do I Stand Pat? Will any of it even matter?

The truth is I don't know what will happen which makes this, not my favorite, but definitely the most intriguing Brewers season I can think of in a long time. For Doctor Who fans, it's much more Clara than Rose Tyler. Or for people who've actually had sex, it's much more LOST than NCIS. Or for people who aren't good with analogies, it's a mystery that won't be solved over night.

Which I guess makes it the perfect season to simulate with OOTP14. So hold on to your hats because we're doing a diary to see just how bad (or good) this season is going to get. (Again.) Continue reading →


20
Sep 12

Norichika Aoki needs some help to win Rookie of the Year

I am going to say something right now that a lot of Brewers fans might not be prepared to hear: Norichika Aoki is not going to win the Rookie of the Year award this season. He won't even be close.

Bryce Harper is a lock for the NL Rookie of the Year award. Bryce Harper is hitting .262/.333/.459 and playing center field (well) on a playoff team as a NINETEEN YEAR OLD. That's kind of amazing. When I was 19 I listened to Kid Rock and worked in a warehouse. I spent all my money on DVDs and alcohol. I was a complete loser with no direction and no hope for the future. It was kind of like now, but I didn't have a cool blog and my girlfriend was less attractive and kind of a weirdo. (Take that, life.) There was no way I could have ever been a starting center fielder in the major leagues. Even if I had the talent that I genetically lack, I still wouldn't have been responsible enough to handle what Bryce Harper is doing right now. What I am trying to say is I hate Bryce Harper. He's better at life than me so screw him.

On the other hand Norichika Aoki is 30. He's hitting a slick .293/.362./.438 that actually makes him a better hitter than Bryce, but he plays right field and his defense is worse. There are a lot of arguments to made that Norichika Aoki is a better player than Bryce Harper this season and that is a very good argument to make. Besides the homerun category Aoki is better or close in nearly every statistical category. Continue reading →


06
Aug 12

Prime 9: Chillest Brewer Bros

Whenever I'm bored and can't find anything to watch on TV I always switch over to the MLB Network to see what's going on. Most of the time it's just a rerun of the previous night's highlights that gets old in about five minutes, but sometimes they show their original program Prime 9. It's essentially a countdown show that features lots of old footage and talking heads, but the talking heads treat the material with respect and the host isn't annoying. It's usually a fun time.

Unfortunately, it hardly ever features the Brewers and why should it? A list of the 9 greatest World Series moments ever shouldn't include the Milwaukee Brewers nor should the 9 greatest third basemen. As much as I love the Milwaukee Brewers I wouldn't exactly call our history "storied." But that doesn't mean they are without merit. Despite the lack of success I think the Milwaukee Brewers are by far the coolest team to follow in all of the land. The Yankees are like following Berkshire Hathaway, ollowing the Nationals is like following Nickelback and you'd have more fun following the wheelchair kid from Glee after the show ends than following the Cubs.

The Milwaukee Brewers aren't only an awesome baseball team that is going to be awesome again real soon (as soon as this season is over), but they are also a great time. Why? Because the Milwaukee Brewers always have some of the chillest bros in all of baseball on their squad and in honor of those bros we now present to you the 9 Chillest Brewer Bros of all time. Continue reading →


01
May 12

Free Fantasy Baseball: Win $350 from MPD and Draftstreet

You may have noticed a lack of fantasy baseball talk on Miller Park Drunk this season. There's been no complaining about Yo's game against the Cardinals killing my team or Ryan Braun single handedly carrying it to victory last night or any of the other "talk about my fantasy team even though nobody else cares" stuff that you normally find on a sports blog. The reason for this is simple: I don't play traditional fantasy baseball anymore.

The reason for this is because season long fantasy sports are a thing of the past. Last football season when the teams I paid $150 or more apiece for were falling apart, I started playing a new kind of fantasy sports and I fell in love with it. I fell in love with Draftstreet.

If you haven’t heard about Draftstreet yet, it's a new way to play fantasy baseball that turns the season long grind into quick one night leagues.  Quick one night leagues where you can win cash money.  You draft a team for one night and get paid out as soon as the games end. Gone are the days of wasting a high draft pick on someone who falls off the map. *coughAlbertPujolscough* It's a lot of fun. I love DraftStreet.com and we are lucky enough to present a co-promotion with them: a FREE one-day fantasy league with $350 in prizes exclusively for Miller Park Drunk fans. Continue reading →

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