16
Jun 12

Pants Party 2 is one month away!

We are now one month away from Miller Park Drunk's Pants Party 2 and somehow there are still tickets available. I don't know why. It's a great deal and you get to drink with some of the coolest people around (and Tyler.) We're drinking, we're eating, we're playing games and we're giving a ton of stuff away in a raffle. It's going to be a good time. So why aren't we sold out?

Well, I have a theory. You see about a year ago I broke up with my girlfriend and somehow thought writing terrible blog posts would get her back. (It didn't. Thank god.) What I didn't think of at the time was that I sounded like a total pussy and a year later nobody would want to come to my Pants Party because they think I have no balls. Seriously, look at this:

Not trying to get too "inside baseball" here, but the truth is that when you stop being yourself you stop being someone that people like to spend time with. Being "the" Miller Park Drunk all the time was a stupid goal and I've changed in a way where that isn't what I want to do anymore, but that doesn't mean that I want to stop having great times at Brewers games.

(Excuse me I have to stab myself in the eye with a lead based pencil a few times. Be right back.) Continue reading →


24
May 10

Is Trevor Hoffman the Smoke Monster?

It's a serious question, right?

John Locke was a good guy and he had a long track record of being reliable. Then one day he was taken over by a Smoke Monster and became the most evil man alive.

Trevor Hoffman was one of the greatest closers of all time and he had a long track record of reliability. Then one day he started to blow every save opportunity he had and gave up tons of homeruns, thus becoming pure evil.

Just a thought.

(Yeah, yeah I know he pitched a good eighth inning yesterday. It's a trap. I'm not falling for it.)

(Side note: Thank God that stupid show is over and I never have to watch it again. It's crazy how something that was once so great, that used to make me care about stuff could fail so miserably to make me care about anything in its final seasons and episode.)

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