Tag Archives: mpd

Meet the new Milwaukee Brewers infield!

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I don't know about you guys, but I am already sick of all this Ryan Braun stuff. Just tell me if he's suspended or not and for how many games if so. That's all I care about. I don't care how or why or who gave him what, all I care is how it affects my watching him. Seriously. (Quick aside: If he does have the herp like everyone seems to think, you should all shut up about it. I guarantee the girl he got it from was worth every cold sore. If you get my drift. WINK NUDGE.) Let's just forget about it for awhile and talk about happier things. (Also, buy the shirt.)

The 2012 Milwaukee Brewers are going to look a lot different than the 2011 Milwaukee Brewers, but that doesn't mean they aren't going to still be freakin' awesome. I mean, let's just look at the 2012 infield. We lost/we're losing Prince Fielder, but overall the infield is going to be better than it was last year. I know that sounds crazy, but it's true! The Brewers are going to be better than they were last year without Prince. Believe that.

Let's meet the new and improved Milwaukee Brewers 2012 infield. Continue reading »

A Casual Brewers Fan’s Guide to the 2011 NLDS

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Everyone keeps saying that we should enjoy this time as Brewers fans because no matter what happens this has been a great season. Many Brewers team records have been set this year, they won their first division since 198-freaking-2 and we have a strong chance of seeing our best player win the MVP award.

Together again. Slightly less drunk.

The regular season shows you who the really good teams are and the playoffs are about luck. If you are a Brewers fan, this is the best time to be alive and every single game is one to be cherished. NO MATTER WHAT. Or at least that's what my even-keeled alter ego would have you believe.

You see today I am not going to be that guy. Today I am going to be your fears personified. I am going to be just as reactionary, judgmental, doubtful, non-believing and fire Ron Roenicke-y as your average Brew Crew Ball editor commenter. (jokes!) Joining me as the voice of reason will be the illustrious Tyler Maas, fresh off a trip to the Vietnamese sweatshop where his slaves employees make his fresh Forward Fabrics t-shirts.

(We started this a few days ago so sorry that some of this is irrelevant.)

MPD: As of right now the Brewers look like they are going to face the Braves in the first round. They can probably beat the Braves, right? I mean, they have better hitting and better pitching and better defense, but we can beat them. (I THINK!?) I'm not worried about the Braves. We kicked them out of Milwaukee and replaced them with the Brewers for a reason.

My question for you Tyler is, what are we going to do if the Brewers end up facing the Phillies? How could we possibly beat them? I saw these regular season games a couple of weeks ago where the Brewers lost 3 out of 4 and they did not look like they could beat the Phillies in those three games that they lost! Has a team ever been eliminated after game 1 before? Is this the year that it happens? Is there any way we can just forfeit the series so everyone can get their playoff ticket money back?

Continue reading »

Why I’m Attending the Pants Party

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Yesterday Larry Granville of Wezen Ball chimed in on his attendance to Miller Park Drunk's Pants Party and today Tyler Maas does the same. These two well respected writers (well, at least Larry is respected) will be attending as well as popular bloggers from Fangraphs, BrewCrewBall and Disciples of Uecker. It's kind of a big deal, but you don't have to be a Brewers blogger to go. No, all you need to do is buy a ticket. There are less than twenty left and I would really like to sell the rest to readers like you instead of barflies from my local tavern. At least you guys won't come up to me every time you see me and be like "Hey, remember that time we went to the Brewers game together? That was awesome" and then have nothing else to say because we're not actually friends and you know nothing about me. I hate people like that. You guys though? You're my people. Now buy a ticket.

I’m sure the near dozen of you Miller Park Drunk readers out there were filled with a lot of different questions when my presence at the inaugural MPD Pants Party was announced last month. Of them: “What’s a Tyler Maas … should I know him?”, “Why hasn’t he updated Doctors of Za in forever?” and “Why is Tyler Maas going to the Pants Party?”

While I cannot offer you clear answers for the first two questions, I sure as shit can chime in on the third. Allow me to answer that question—Why is Tyler Maas going to the Pants Party?—with another question. Why wouldn’t I go to the Pants Party? (do you see how I turned that around on you?)

If that Ginsu-sharp witticism isn’t enough to explain why some random dude who, of late, is referenced here more than he actually blogs about baseball, then here are a few more reasons why I will be—and you should be—picking up the slacks (double entendre) in Pants Party attendance. These reasons appear in no particular order, excluding importance to me. Continue reading »

MPD Book Cover Review: Chicago Cubs Cookbook

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It is said that looking into Derrek Lee's eyes will reveal your future. Unfortunately, the Cubs future is always the same.

Let's make Tyler Colvin make a stupid face. No, let's make Tyler Colvin make a stupid face and put a red pepper right in front of his nose! Yeah, it's not like he's our most marketable player or anything.

Hi, I'm Koyie Hill. No, I don't know why I am on the cover of this either.

Hey, let's get Fukudome in there and give him some chopsticks. Get it? Because he's Asian!

It's-a me, Dempster! I hope-a you like a spicy meatball!

You know who we should put on this cover? Alfonso Soriano. I know he's routinely booed at Wrigley Field and he still has four years and almost $70 million left on his untradeable contract, but still. I feel like he should be on there. Maybe something with a lime? He is Dominican, you know. Those people love limes.

I figured so what if he's had a few anger issues? He apologized; Carlos should hold the knife.

Just look at Ted Lilly; he just looks like he's going to be traded to the Dodgers by the time this book comes out.

Two catchers? Really?

Seriously, Dempster is such a douche.

The Five Foods You Will Eat at Miller Park Drunk’s Pants Party

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Miller Park Drunk's Pants Party is under three weeks away. In case you've been living under a rock for the past few weeks the party is taking place on 8/29 at Miller Park and includes a pre-game tailgate with free beer and food as well as a ticket to the game, for only $25. We are getting closer and closer to the cut off date so if you haven't already reserved your spot you should do that now.

If you are one of those people who still needs convincing we thought the best way to convince you would be to give you a sneak peak at our menu. Our chef, Citizens Bank Park Drunk, did a really great job with this thing and I'm REALLY excited to eat it. You should be too.

MPD Pants Party Menu

A menu loosely based on our beloved sausage race. Continue reading »