22
Feb 11

Milwaukee Brewers prepared for the best spring training ever

Spring training has begun for the Milwaukee Brewers and excitement has reached an all-time high. With the trades for Yuniesky Betancourt and Shaun Marcum; the team, fans, management and everyone in Wisconsin has expectations through the roof. It might sound crazy to say, but this might just be the most important spring training of our lives.

Or it could be just like every other spring training. A lot of stupid questions, terrible speculation and a whole bunch of BS. For example, check out what Ryan Braun recently had to say about new manager Ron Roenicke. Keep in mind Ryan Braun had been in spring training for an entire day before making this statement.

It’s a thousand times different now. The whole atmosphere, the whole environment is much more positive. There’s just an aura of excitement. When you walk in here, you can literally feel the difference. We can all sense it and it’s exciting. The more positive your work environment is, the more conducive it is to accomplishing anything you can to be successful. He was really positive and optimistic and he was a great communicator. I think those things are something we all look for in a leader and a manager.

Really, Ryan? You gained all of that from one day?

(I secretly hope that Roenicke was just saving his negativity until today's first full practice so we can see Ryan Braun come out and say "Yeah, so, Roenicke's kind of a dick.")

Still, he said it so it's out there now. The Brewers are now in a better, more positive atmosphere and even better Ryan Braun is in the BEST SHAPE OF HIS LIFE.

So we can cross "_______ is in the best shape of his life" and "this year feels different/everything is better" off of our spring training story to do list. What else can we cross off? Continue reading →


10
Feb 11

2011 Milwaukee Brewers Bobbleheads: No Gallardo, lots of grit (and white people)

The Milwaukee Brewers recently released their 2011 promotional schedule and along with it came the announcement of who would be getting a bobblehead. There are a few surprises, Randy Wolf when almost everyone thought his signing was a bust (it wasn't, but that's the belief out there) is one great example, but no head scratchers. Unless you count Craig Counsell who had a OPS+ of 76 last year and hasn't once been a starting player unless there was an injury, but there are reasons for him beyond statistics. There are reasons for everyone really.

Date Bobblehead Expected Reason
April 24 John Axford Doug Melvin's rule that at least one Canadian get a bobblehead. Also, white.
May 22 Casey McGehee JS MVP, white.
June 12 Zack Greinke Duh.
July 10 Hot Dog Whitest of all racing sausages.
August 14 Craig Counsell Is named Craig Counsell. Also, white.
September 25 Randy Wolf Brewers had to get their $30 million worth somehow. Also, white.

A lot of people have a problem with these selections because there is a disturbing lack of the "good" Brewers. No Prince or Braun for the 85th time, no Rickie Weeks or Corey Hart who had huge seasons last year and no Yovani Gallardo who has actually never had a bobblehead made in his likeness by the Milwaukee Brewers. It's weird right? It reminds of 2009 when Jason Kendall got one over Mike Cameron despite being worse in every way. To find the answer I went to another blogger who seems to be an expert in these things. I use the term "blogger" lightly because his blog isn't actually up yet and he only has a twitter account, but on this particular topic I think he knows his stuff. So take it away, KuKluxBrewKrew. Continue reading →


25
Jan 11

Go Steelers?

The Green Bay Packers are going to the Super Bowl!!!

This is an exciting time for everyone in Wisconsin with even a passing interest in football and the next two weeks are going to be all football, all the time. The team that has dominated the Wisconsin sports landscape for the past 100 years will now attempt to take full control of our minds and souls with a win in the Super Bowl. A trip to the Super Bowl is huge, but what does it mean to us? What does it mean to you? What does it mean to the Brewers? Continue reading →


20
Jan 11

Miller Park Drunk answers your questions

Sometimes we get emails and we don't reply to them. We don't do this because we mean to, but because we forget or because we're lazy or because we just read the email on our iPhone while sitting at the bar and don't have the wherewithal to type out a reply. It's nothing personal. Sometimes we get comments that drive us crazy that we want to reply to, but just don't because like I said we're kind of lazy. It happens. Sometimes we get twitter and facebook messages (because we ask for them) from people who want to know things. When these things happen, we answer your questions. Maybe we don't do it right away and the responses aren't exactly what anyone would call timely, but we do reply. We always reply. We love you guys.

MPD,

I'm interested on who you would pick as manager. Bobby Valentine? How about Tom Trebelhorn. He took a major screwing from Sal (Remember Antoine Williamson?) Bando back in '91 (probably before your time). Bando was the GM who let Molitor go, by the way.

JMB

Ron Roenicke! Nailed it!

Two part question. what's your favorite kind of drunk? Which is your favorite racing sausage?

- CiltantroNate Continue reading →


19
Jan 11

Prince Fielder is the highest paid Milwaukee Brewer of all time

Milwaukee, WI -- Prince Fielder settled his arbitration case with the Milwaukee Brewers and will now make $15.5 million dollars to play in 2011 making him the highest paid Milwaukee Brewer of all time. He gets a $5m raise over last season and has now made over $36.7 million in his Brewers playing career. He surpasses teammate Zack Greinke and former Brewer Jeff Suppan to become the highest paid player in team history.

"I still made $42 million from that team in my career so I don't really care." Said Jeff Suppan when asked about losing the team record. "Prince still can't touch me there."

Added Suppan "Can I get a plug in? Print this article out for 15% off your next meal at Soup's. Don't miss $5 Fridays and our Fast Pitch lunch specials. Go Cardinals."

Fielder doesn't know what he plans to do with the money, but according to his wife he is going to save every penny. "Prince has another thing coming if he thinks he's going to spend all that money on a fancy new car or something for himself. That money is going straight to me and the kids. College fund, school clothes, braces, books, toys, Justin Bieber performing at their birthday party; only the best for our kids and don't forget about me. Don't even think about forgetting about me Prince" said Chanel, who does all the hard work around here anyway. "Prince can keep driving the mini van. There's nothing wrong with it."

When reached for comment Fielder's agent Scott Boras just threw money in the air and laughed maniacally. Our attempts to follow up failed when his secretary said that he was "super crunk" from drinking a virgin's blood and that it'd be best to leave.

According to long time teammate Corey Hart it would be a good idea for Prince, who has been a vegetarian since 2008, to go get a cheeseburger from McDonalds.

"He's always going on about how when he was a kid he did a McDonalds commercial with his dad and Cecil didn't buy him a cheeseburger. 'A double cheeseburger was only $1.19!' he says it every time we pass a McDonalds. It's like you're a millionaire just buy yourself a cheeseburger, man."

Fielder has also expressed some worry about his new found fortune. "I just keep hearing about how more money means more problems and that doesn't sound very cool. And then I heard this song that was like 'money must be funny in a rich man's world' which I have no idea what that meant, but it doesn't sound good. Really catchy though."

At press time, Fielder decided it was best not to spend any money and stick with the 2008 Honda Odyssey he'd been driving for the past three years. "It's just been so good to us, you know?"