MPD’s Guide to St Patrick’s Day

Off-Base March 17th, 2010

It's that time of year again, St. Patrick's Day. Along with Cinco De Mayo and someone else's birthday, it's one of the world's greatest excuses to get drunk for no real reason. Many children have been sired on this day and many people have gotten their first taste of the long arm of the law during a St. Patty's Day celebration. It's a shame really that some people have to ruin a perfectly good drinking day by getting into some sort of trouble. Luckily, your past problems will remain there because from today and on into the future you will have this guide to get you through. You are welcome.

Miller Park Drunk's Guide to St. Patrick's Day Read the rest of this entry »

This Week in Witardo: Prince Fielder is a pussy

Baseball March 1st, 2010

Because I am insanely jealous that Anthony Witrado has a job working for the Journal Sentinel and I don't, I am going to make fun of him on a regular basis FJM style. It really has nothing to do with his writing I am just a bitter wannabe. Well maybe it has a little bit to do with his writing.

Okay, it's completely due to his writing. Today's story: Fielder uses fear as his fuel

Phoenix — Looking at him, it's far from obvious.

That he's a pussy.

His imposing stature, the tattoos, the snarling looks, the regal name. All those things just act as his mask.

His mask to hide the fact that he is a wuss.

But the fear is immune to those elements and nestles comfortably inside Prince Fielder, ignoring any resistance from his outward machismo and bravado.

Much like a gay man still in the closet.

His psyche is a breeding ground for that fear. It is a constant within the man.

Like his heartbeat, only wussier.

The fear consumes every aspect of his life, and has so from childhood.

That movie Child's Play? Totally freaked him out. Read the rest of this entry »

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