02
Sep 10

Searching for Miller Park Drunk

We get a lot of hits from search engines. Almost 3000 last month alone. Sometimes it's people looking for our site who are too lazy to type the address in and other times it's people trying to find pictures of Randy Wolf's girlfriend. Which I love because this is what they find:

That picture gets me every time.

Anyways, some of the search terms are kind of insane and hilarious and we thought it'd be fun to share some of the better ones. Continue reading →


08
Jul 10

Goodbye Corey Hart

I don't give a crap what happens in today's Milwaukee Brewers game. I really, really don't. After last night's 15-1 loss that saw me:

  1. Drink warm beer on the drive up.
  2. Sweat more than I ever have in my entire life during the first two innings. Seriously, with the roof and panels closed Miller Park turns into the world's largest sauna.
  3. Get flaked out on by a date (shut up, female commenters).
  4. Not even enjoy a Rickie Weeks homerun.
  5. Leave early. (!)

It wasn't the best day for me and after all of that, I don't really feel like watching or caring today. The playoff chances that me and like two other people were holding onto are now gone. The Milwaukee Brewers will not make the playoffs. The Milwaukee Brewers will be lucky to finish around .500. This isn't that bad of a thing. [I don't actually believe this one bit. It is the frickin' worst thing. - Editor] I guess we should have seen this coming after Trevor Hoffman blew all those saves and we had that one losing streak, right? We dug a big, early hole that was going to be near impossible to dig our way out of. We weren't able to do the impossible and now we will not make the playoffs. It happens, we'll try again next year (which I am totally pumped for by the way). This season is over.

This doesn't mean that I am going to quit this site or even write less. Hell, I'll probably write more now that this weight of contention is off of my shoulders. This worrying about the outcomes of every single game. I can just enjoy the games and the Miller Park experience. I can go into a few games during the third inning and not feel like I am missing anything. As a matter of fact, I think I will do that for all future Chris Narveson starts. I really wanted this season to work out, but it didn't. I can deal with this.

Now I'll be right back to talk about Corey Hart. I just need a minute to process. I'm just going to watch this music video a few times and reflect on my entire life.

It pours. Man, it pours.

/wipes eyes

Okay, aaannnnndddd I'm good. I'm back. I never wanted them to do good this season anyways. [Again, a total lie. I wanted them to do good so bad. -Editor]

At some point during yesterday's loss I realized that this may be one of the last times I see Corey Hart in person as a member of the Milwaukee Brewers. I've gotten a lot of mileage out of Corey Hart jokes on this site and I've complained about him quite a bit in the past too. What can I say? It was the cool thing to do. Still, I am really going to miss the guy and not just for the jokes. [This is sort of a lie. I will really miss the jokes. -Editor] The truth is that I've always liked Corey Hart, but he's just always seemed to let me down. I wanted him to be good, like he is now, for so long that he just ended up letting me down so many times that I lashed out. Its like when my son tells me he doesn't want to watch Wall-E. I mean, Why wouldn't you want to watch Wall-E? It's a tale of true robot love and a little robot could that shows more emotion than your stupid Veggietales could ever dream of and you don't want to watch it? What the hell is wrong with you, little kid? Its stupid and irrational for me to get this upset about it, but that's how I've always thought. Why can't you be better, Corey? And then, of course, it happened and I was too stupid to realize it. Continue reading →


26
Apr 10

Monday Mailbag: Zaun, Weeks, JJ and Cubs fans

Welcome to a new semi-regular feature here at the site, the Monday Mailbag. I figure if Anthony Witrado can get 500 questions at the JSOnline I should be able to get at least 5-10. If you're sad you missed out, we'll be accepting questions through our Facebook page or our twitter account on Mondays semi-regularly throughout the season.

This might end up getting long so I am not going to waste any more time and just get right into the questions.

What are the comparison stats between Zaun (Brewers) and Kendall (Royals) so far this season?
-Wendy

Depends on how you look at it, if you look at it purely on better average then Kendall is the much better player.

Batting Average
Kendall: .318
Zaun: .157

But if you include counting stats that actually matter in the box score, then it's a lot more even. That is to say, they both suck. Continue reading →


21
Apr 10

Rickie Weeks: All Star

I take my All-Star ballot pretty seriously. When I am casting my All-Star ballot I consider who is the best this year and who is the best historically. Ichiro gets my vote every time because he is a first ballot Hall of Famer and an All-Star game without Ichiro is like sex without waffles. As much as I may personally hate Alex Rodriguez for being a tremendous douche, I normally vote for him because he is the best at his position. However, when it comes to my favorite players I am a bit bias. I voted for Mike Cameron last season, every time and despite him being injured at the time of voting I voted for Rickie Weeks every time. The All Star Game is a time for your favorite players, hopefully the best players to shine on the biggest possible stage and that's why this year I say we vote Rickie Weeks on the team.

I know that people have mixed feelings about Rickie Weeks. He's a letdown for a #1 pick, he's injury prone and he's not that good of a defender. That's fine, you are all entitled to your opinion but the truth is you can't ignore the facts. You're not CNN (joke © Al's Ramblings). Before he got injured last season Rickie Weeks was the Brewers MVP. In just 37 games he hit 9 homeruns and had an OPS of .857. He was on pace for a monster season. His detractors said that it was just a fluke, but so far this season he has picked up right where he left off. While these early season numbers that shouldn't be taken too seriously, it's hard to ignore his two homeruns and 1.046 OPS. If this was a movie now would be about the time that Morpheus says that "he is starting to believe." Rickie Weeks is figuring this out and he is making a huge difference in this Brewers lineup.

Will this last forever? I don't know. Will he still be a Brewer in a couple seasons with Brett Lawrie playing the same position and hitting well in the minors? I don't know. What I do know is that so far this season he is one of the few bright spots on the team and I think it's about time we reward him for it. Hell, we rewarded Corey Hart for it and he wasn't nearly this good. (Yeah, I said it.) How do we reward Rickie? How can we possibly let Rickie Weeks know that we appreciate everything he is doing? How can we let Rickie know that we like him, we really really like him?

WE ARE GOING TO MAKE RICKIE WEEKS AN ALL-STAR Continue reading →


01
Apr 10

Corey Hart > Jim Edmonds

I wouldn't call myself a big Corey Hart fan. In my personal rankings of "Brewers I like to make fun of whenever possible" he ranks right below Ryan Braun. This isn't to say that I don't like Corey Hart as a baseball player, I just think he's, well, mostly pointless. He's valuable when he's good and I like him, but when he's not good I have no use for him. (Unlike Rickie Weeks who struggles and I make ten thousand excuses for.) If Corey Hart falls off the cliff I'll be the first one calling for his head, but if he breaks out as a star I'll be clamoring for the Brewers to keep him. My feelings on Corey are 100% performance based. I don't really care about Corey Hart either way and I refuse to watch The Blind Side no matter how badly he wants me to.

Now, Corey Hart has struggled mightily this spring (something like 1 for 27) and the Brewers spring training invitee Jim Edmonds has been doing pretty well for himself. So well that the Brewers are considering making right field into a platoon with Edmonds taking most of the at-bats against right handed pitching. This makes pretty good sense. A quick look at his splits show that throughout his career Jim Edmonds has killed right handed pitching (career .954 OPS (!)) and that Corey Hart has fared better against left handers (career OPS .854). Beyond that, as a career center fielder Edmonds should be better, possibly a lot better defensively in right. This is the kind of move you like to see your team making. A smart decision based in performance and giving the team the best chance to win. I really want to get behind this move except there is one minor detail that the team seems to be completely ignoring and that's the fact that.. Continue reading →