15
Feb 12

What Your Shirsey Says About You

A lot of people don't really like the shirsey (t-shirt jersey), but I have personally always been a fan of them. It's a good way to casually date a player before committing and making it facebook official. Plus, it's a great way to support a player that you know will only be with the team for a short time. Like when the Brewers made the trade for K-Rod last year. You can support him because he's pretty freakin' awesome, but you also don't have to blow a bunch of money when you know there is no way he'll be back in 2012. (Wait, what?!) It also works great for when you want to support an underutilized bench player that could be released or sent down at any moment. (I don't know why, but purchasing that Brad Nelson shirsey really seemed like a great idea at the time.) Shirseys are fun and an MPD approved fashion item.

However, I should warn you about them. While shirseys are cool they also say a lot about you as a person. Anyone can get a Ryan Braun jersey and remain a relative enigma to strangers (because it's freakin' Ryan Braun), but the purchase of a specific player's shirsey tells people things and opens you up to a whole mess of assumptions about your character. I want you to be ready for that, I want you to know what your shirsey says about you so you can purchase accordingly and that is why I made this list. See what a nice guy I am? Continue reading →


10
Feb 11

2011 Milwaukee Brewers Bobbleheads: No Gallardo, lots of grit (and white people)

The Milwaukee Brewers recently released their 2011 promotional schedule and along with it came the announcement of who would be getting a bobblehead. There are a few surprises, Randy Wolf when almost everyone thought his signing was a bust (it wasn't, but that's the belief out there) is one great example, but no head scratchers. Unless you count Craig Counsell who had a OPS+ of 76 last year and hasn't once been a starting player unless there was an injury, but there are reasons for him beyond statistics. There are reasons for everyone really.

Date Bobblehead Expected Reason
April 24 John Axford Doug Melvin's rule that at least one Canadian get a bobblehead. Also, white.
May 22 Casey McGehee JS MVP, white.
June 12 Zack Greinke Duh.
July 10 Hot Dog Whitest of all racing sausages.
August 14 Craig Counsell Is named Craig Counsell. Also, white.
September 25 Randy Wolf Brewers had to get their $30 million worth somehow. Also, white.

A lot of people have a problem with these selections because there is a disturbing lack of the "good" Brewers. No Prince or Braun for the 85th time, no Rickie Weeks or Corey Hart who had huge seasons last year and no Yovani Gallardo who has actually never had a bobblehead made in his likeness by the Milwaukee Brewers. It's weird right? It reminds of 2009 when Jason Kendall got one over Mike Cameron despite being worse in every way. To find the answer I went to another blogger who seems to be an expert in these things. I use the term "blogger" lightly because his blog isn't actually up yet and he only has a twitter account, but on this particular topic I think he knows his stuff. So take it away, KuKluxBrewKrew. Continue reading →


12
Aug 10

300 Days of Fielder

Last night the Brewers saw a pretty cool record take place. No, I'm not talking about becoming only the seventh team in history to give up four straight homeruns in an inning. That'd be stupid. Why would I want to talk about that? HUH? WHY!? MY PARENTS GOT DIVORCED WHEN I WAS A KID DO YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT THAT TOO!? (*takes deep breath, hugs Teddy Ruxpin*)

No, what I am talking about is Prince Fielder starting his 300th consecutive game. He already broke Robin Yount's 274 game streak earlier this season, but you know how baseball is with it's big round numbers and 300 just sounds better than 274. Coming on a week in which we saw the Brewers roll out an outfield of Alcides Escobar, Joe Inglett and Lorenzo Cain because of injuries to Braun and Hart, it becomes even more impressive. I mean, if you put Braun, Fielder and Hart in a lineup and asked someone to pick the healthiest of the three would anyone pick Prince? Anyone? Yet, that's the way it's been for over two years now. In fact, since becoming a Brewer Prince Fielder has never spent anytime on the DL and the least amount of games he's played in a full season is 157. Since 2006 Prince has appeared in 751 of a possible 763 games. Seriously. Prince is the shit, yo. Continue reading →


20
Jan 10

Retro Weekends are going to be awesome

I love Retro Friday at Miller Park. Some out there will rail against it saying that we need to leave the past in the past and that the team needs to forge it's own identity and blah blah blah, to which I say screw off. Saying we should get rid of the ball and glove logo is like saying we should get rid of the American flag. You know who wants to get rid of the American flag? Terrorists.

Luckily for us and the safety of our nation, the Brewers agree with me. In fact they are taking retro Fridays into the future for their 40th anniversary and turning them into four retro weekends. Let me tell you, they sound AWESOME. Continue reading →


14
Sep 09

Meet the new boss, much cooler than the old boss

neweditor

WAZZUP BITCHEZZ????

Welcome to the NEW and IMPROVED Miller Park Drunk. I'm Chad and I am the new boss (and yes that is me bombin' two Old Styles at once,WHAT). Your prolly thinking "why is this dude in a Cubs jersey who can drink two Old Styles at a time and is obviously a pimp buying a site called Miller Park Drunk? Well, if there is one thing I have learned in my life it's that you don't have to like the Brewers to get drunk at Miller Park! Heck, you don't even have to like baseball! In the history of Miller Park the best drunks have ALWAYS come from Chi-town.

look at me i'm the old editor, i'm a stupid faget

"look at me i'm the old editor, i'm stupid"

For real though, I been reading this website for awhile and thought it was pretty frickin' funny. I just knew that I could make it better. How? By making it about the Cubs, DUH!!!! So I took some money out of my trust fund and gave that idiot who was running it an offer he couldn't refuse (fifty bucks, a 12 pack of Milwaukee's Best and the issue of Playboy with Sable from WWF.) You Wisconsin folk are so simple.

Things are gonna be a bit different around here now. First order of business is to make up for all the dumb stuff this idiot said before. Like who doesn't like a good retro jersey? My prized possession is my autographed Sosa jersey. I'm not supposed to wear that just because he's not on the team anymore? BITE ME MILLER PARK DRUNK! Did Paul Moliter ever hit 60 homers in a season? Didn't think so! How about Robin Yount? No? I CAN'T HEAR YOU!

Anyways that's enough for the day I gotta head down to the Cubby Bear for a little pregame before the Cubs WHOOP some Brewers ASS tonight. That's right, Ryan Braun does my taxes. I'll be the dude in the autographed Sosa jersey sipping on Old Style. If you see me come say whats up and maybe I'll give you a little tug off my flask. Jack Daniels? YOU DAMN RIGHT JACK DANIELS.

Tomorrow we should have some more awesome, way better than before stuff including a VERY SPECIAL GUEST WRITER who I think kicks total ass and more stuff that kicks ass. Have fun watching the game tonight, I know I will.

PREDICTION: Cubs 17 Brewers 1. Theriot hits for the cycle.

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