17
Jul 14

The Best And Worst of the Milwaukee Brewers First Half

It's a semi-annual feature, the Best and Worst of the Milwaukee Brewers first half! The first half of the season is done so it's time for us to once again steal the Best and Worst format from With Spandex and cover the good, the bad and the ugly of the Brewers first half.

But before we get into that, I need to remind you that the Miller Park Drunk Pants Party aka The Greatest Tailgate Party Of The Summer is coming up in just ten days. Strangely, there are still tickets available and we would really like for you to come. Tickets include a game ticket, beer koozie, commemorative cup, all-you-can-eat delicious tailgate food and all-you-can-drink beer/strawberry, jalapeno and watermelon infused margaritas/more. We are grilling up brats, bringing back the brat pizza from last year and doing NY-themed meatball sandwiches. It's going to be good. The game is 7/27. You can get four tickets for $120. All you need to do is show up and watch the Brewers beat the Mets. You will have the time of your life. Do it. (And if you can't go you can at least buy a koozie pack.)

The Brewers are in first place so this should be easy, right? Everything is a best! It is the greatest season ever! We are cruising into the playoffs! Right? Right?! Continue reading →


23
Jun 14

All-Stars? The Milwaukee Brewers Are All Stars

brewersallstarsThere's been a lot of talk about the All-Star game lately and as of this writing the Brewers don't have any starters on the team. This is the despite the fact that Jonathan Lucroy is the best catcher in the league, Carlos Gomez is the best center fielder in the league, Ryan Braun is the best former PED user in the league and Mark Reynolds is one of the most lol-worthy picks on the ballot. There is still time for Wisconsinites to go crazy voting, but as it stands they are the team with the best record in the National League on the outside looking in at the All-Star Game. Some people care about these things, some don't. (Personally, I'd rather have Lucroy take the rest but with his batting average there is no way that is happening.) The truth is that it doesn't really matter if the Brewers have any All-Stars because they are all stars, the whole team.

It's a testament to Doug Melvin how really, ridiculously good this team is. I don't fully understand it, but they are just loaded with talent. The lineup, which isn't much different than last year's, is great. The bullpen is great. The rotation is great. Despite doing some things that make me wonder what they are thinking on a yearly basis, Doug Melvin and his staff have built the BEST team in the National League (so far). Seriously, look at these guys: Continue reading →


04
Jun 14

9 Totally True Milwaukee Brewers Stories That Will Literally Blow Your Mind (For Real!)

Warning: These Brewers facts may change everything you know about reality. Continue reading →


08
May 14

Scooter’s gonna Scooter, but remember Rickie Weeks?

Outside of Carlos Gomez and Jonathan Lucroy, the Brewers most consistent (healthy) hitter has been Scooter Gennett. GOOD ON YOU SCOOTER! YOU DID IT! WAY TO PROVE THOSE DOUBTERS WRONG! LITTLE GUY DONE GOOD! HUMAN HANK!

Only it's not really a compliment because the Brewers offense kinda sucks right now and his solid .283 batting average is somewhat negated by his .319 OBP and .398 SLG. His 4.9 walk percentage is pretty dang low and he doesn't hit for much power. Basically, the dude hits a bunch of singles and if he doesn't do that he probably isn't doing much. He is a solid baseball player and one that the Brewers are lucky to have to plug into this sorry ass lineup, but that is all he is. He reminds me of my teenage self, he's lucky to get to second base. He isn't a key to your lineup. He isn't a solid #2 hitter or an acceptable #3 hitter, no matter how many injuries you have. You know when Roenicke batted him third that time he was like:

scooterhittingthird

He is a dude who hits a lot of singles and that's it. That's not a bad thing, it's just not the best thing. What would be best is for Ryan Braun to come back and do Ryan Braun things. (Ryan Braun things in this case means hitting baseballs. It is not a euphemism for using drugs or getting urine collectors fired.) But who knows when that will happen. Another thing that could happen is for Rickie Weeks to get some more at-bats. Continue reading →


03
Jun 13

Scooter-Mania FINALLY Reaches Milwaukee

ScooterManiaFor being a player who's never played a game in Milwaukee, Brewers fans sure seem to love Ryan Joseph "Scooter" Gennett.

The fan base's blind affection so generously heaped upon the childlike frame of the scant second baseman is probably on account of two main reasons. First, and most important, Gennett hit .297, stole eight bases and tallied 60 hits through 50 games in Nashville this season. Not bad at all. But it seems like the primary reason fans have been ardently clamoring for Scooter to climb the prospect ladder is--aside from him not being Rickie Weeks--is on account of how he's managed to play slightly above average triple-A ball while still being able to shop at Gap Kids. Well, the boisterous and largely-unintelligible cries of Team Scooter were finally heard today, as the impish infielder was promoted to the Milwaukee Brewers 25-man roster.

Let me start by saying that I harbor no ill will toward Gennett. I wish him loads of success in Milwaukee over the course of a lengthy and memorable career. However, I just don't see that happening. Sure, the little guy is the sixth rated prospect in the Brewers minor league system, but that same minor league system is considered to be among the worst in baseball. The Expos have better prospects waiting in the wings. Being the sixth best prospect the Brewers has to offer is as much a badge of honor was being one of the best actors in Fast & Furious 6, a touring musician in support of Josh Groban or third runner-up in the Miss Vermont pageant.

We live in an age of baseball that's, thankfully, less reliant on a player's ability to "look" like a pro and "show he has the tools to last in this league" and 5,000 other things you've heard Harold Reynolds say. I won't pretend to be an expert on advanced metrics, but I do appreciate that player evaluation has advanced beyond looking at how an adult man looks in a uniform, how hard he can hit a baseball and how he "leave it all on the field." I love the increased acceptance of defense-first players on rosters throughout the league and how ballparks are adding OBP to their jumbotron stats.

Yet Scooter-Mania seems to hint that no matter how much we know about baseball and how much the way we watch the game has changed for the better, it's nothing compared to the allure of seeing a man with a unique body-type play at a level and with a frequency he shouldn't be permitted. Scooter Gennett is baseball John Kuhn. In the same way the collective screams of "KUUUUUUUUHN!!!" showed Lambeau Field preferred to put the fate of 4th and 1 in the incapable hands of a white, 250-pound undrafted backup fullback from Shippensburg instead of Ryan Grant in his prime, is the same logic that goes into seeking out a 5'10" (listed--he's maybe 5'6") and 150-pound singles hitter taken in the 16th round to take over at second base for a struggling-but-proven first round pick/former All-Star with three 20-homer run seasons to his credit and a career OBP that's higher than any single season Gennett has had since low-A ball.

As a whole, we like "scrappy" and "gritty" players because they're like us. They weren't blessed with the bodies to be able to succeed in professional sports. When an Eckstein or a Gennett squeezes through the cracks, it's a victory for us. Maybe we can do something with our life someday. Maybe we will get that raise so we can finally buy that boat or trick that cute bartender into going on a date with us. It's all kind of sad. And when the anomaly has a nickname like "Scooter," we're eating out of his hand.

I might be wrong (and I really hope I am), but I just don't think Scooter Gennett is the answer... unless the question is in regard to a cheap, warm body that will keep fans watching a fourth place team while Doug Melvin tries to free up salary by trading Rickie Weeks for peanuts. Right now, even Jeff Bianchi seems like a better option at second than Gennett does. And if Gennett is so goddamn valuable and meaningful for Milwaukee's future, then why start his arbitration clock, toss him unnecessary service time and rob him of regular at-bats in meaningless contests?

As neat as it is to see a homegrown prospect ascend to the Major League level, I think both the time and the player are wrong. Bookmark this and tweet quotes at me when I'm wrong, but I think Scooter Gennett is more likely to wind up as a funny "Oh my God, I forgot about him!!!" reference we pull out to make friends laugh in 2019 than a productive every day player at the big league level. Rickie Weeks may not be the right man for Milwaukee's 2B job right now (even though he is), but neither is a scrappy-gritty miniature who we can live vicariously through.

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