01
Oct 09

What are these people smoking?

Dumb Brewers fan in a Favre Brewers jerseyJust checked out the always enjoyable for all the wrong reasons Anthony Witrado chat from last week and seriously, what is wrong with you people? Are you stoned? I do not like Anthony Witrado, this is well known, but I am starting to think that A-dub is just Charles Manson and the people who participate in these chats are the ones out killing people. Look at some of these questions, it is not pretty.

Q: Michael, Chicago - Thanks for all of your hard work this season Anthony.

Work? He's talking about the time he spends in the mirror adjusting his hat sideways right?

Q: stu pidasso, westallica - hi anthony. just for fun, let's pretend you're doug melvin.

WHY? WHY DO YOU THINK THIS WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA? I've got a better one. Let's pretend you are David Carradine. Here's a belt.

Q: Justink8996 - Do you guys have an update on Alcides "baby mama" drahma? Kinda hard to root for a guy who is a dead beat dad? Guess it would be pretty awkward as a journalist to even ask him about it? "Oh Alcides by the way...." Continue reading →


21
Sep 09

The celebrity roast of Doug Melvin

There is a lot of talk about Doug Melvin these days. Whether it's his bobblehead day, the Fire Doug Melvin blog or Mark A's recent comments about him. Everyone has an opinion on Doug Melvin, he is a hot item right now. Whether or not he is to blame for what happened this season is up for discussion (I say no), but he is our GM and he's pretty good at what he does. He's important to this team's future. Now I've been watching TV all of my life and I know there is only one true way to honor those who are important to you and that's with a roast.

So join a calvacade of stars as they roast Brewers General Manager Doug Melvin live from the Pabst Theater(!) after the jump. Continue reading →


01
Sep 09

Meet Alcides Escobar ladies

Sometimes I forget that I may have more female readers than I have male readers and that talking negatively about JJ Hardy is probably not the best course of action. The problem is the JJ days are probably over. The Alcides Escobar era is here and there's nothing we can do about it. I want the ladies to love Alcides, but the fact is that he is nowhere near as good looking as JJ Hardy. A friend of mine tells me that he enjoys vodka/cranberry and Michael Jackson, but that's just not enough to make this happen. We need more.

Luckily for Alcides he has me on his side. Here's 10 things that Alcides Escobar can do (scratch that, WILL DO) to make the ladies love him like they love JJ. When we're done with him he's going to make JJ Hardy look like Jonathan Knight (to his Donnie Wahlberg (or Joey McIntyre depending on your preference)) and no one will care when he comes out of the closet.

Continue reading →


01
Sep 09

Why am I supposed to feel sorry for JJ Hardy again?

JJ Hardy Flow ChartHey, what's up gang? I'm back, I survived the swine flu. (Well, not really but it sounds better to explain the absence.) Did I miss anything? No? Not really? No trades? No 5,000 Jeff Suppan heads on the field on Sunday? Anyways, it's good to be back. You know who else thinks it's good to be back? JJ Hardy.

That's right, he's back! Today against the Cardinals, JJ Hardy will be on the roster. The only thing is he falls one day short of some MLB rule that makes no sense so he remains under Brewers control until after 2011, instead of after 2010. Reading the baseball blogs around the internet people have been calling the Brewers unethical to do this or just plain wrong. Why? Because delaying his free agency like this costs him money. To which I say, who gives a shit? Continue reading →


18
Aug 09

EXCLUSIVE: Gorman Thomas to attempt comeback with Cubs

In an interview with a small town Illinois newspaper Gorman Thomas said that he would "like to play again." When asked why now, 23 years after retiring, he wanted to come back Gorman said that he'd "like to help the Cubbies finally get that World Series." Cubs general manager Jim Hendry declined to comment, but did admit that there was interest.

UPDATE: Gorman tells ESPN's Buster Olney that his quotes were taken out of context and he is enjoying retirement. Continue reading →

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