- "Is Dusty Baker sleeping with Corey Patterson?": Yahoo! Answers investigates.
- Corey Patterson montage: A fan video set to Survivor.
- Someone actually has to tell Dusty Baker that Corey Patterson sucks: Anytime you can talk bad about Baker and Patterson in the same article, Cubs fans will read it.
- Corey "tarded" Patterson
- Corey hasn't learned a damn thing: desipio, a sports blog pioneer.
- Corey Patterson has a new nickname: Orioles fans love him too.
- Corey story: Moral of the story? Don't let Corey dress himself.
- Walk Off Walk's Patterson t-shirt
- Bleacher bums tell Patterson how they feel: Or maybe just one guy.
- Corey Patterson's Baseball Reference Page: Perhaps the funniest of all. -30 OPS+ this season, is that even possible?
The Brewers are enjoying a comfortable 9-3 lead.
|/wipes 2 liters of sweat off brow
Wha? Who keeps doin' dat? I be tryin' to pitch good.
|(whispering) It's me. Trevor.|
|Oh, hey boss. What can I do for ya?|
|I need you to give up three runs.|
|Wha? Why? We need to win this one boss! We cruisin' to a victory!|
|Don't worry about that, just give up this home run so the game will be a save situation.|
|Bu..bu.... but I wanted to be a startin again soon! I need to prove myself to Mr. Mancha!|
|Listen Red, you're never going to be a starter again.|
|For one, you're not that good.|
|Aww hell that don't matter. Look at the rest of our staff.|
|True, but you're also nature's mistake.|
|What in the sam hell is that supposed to mean?|
|What's wrong with it?|
|Don't play dumb I've seen you on Yahoo Answers.|
|Yeah, but there been lotsa good red headed baseball players.|
|Man, you got a creepy lookin' face. It looks like you stole it from a wax museum in the Dells.
Okay, what 'bout Bobby Kielty?
|Maybe in the California Penal League.|
|Maybe in the Betty Ford League.|
|Doug Rader! He won 5 Gold Gloves!|
|Yeah, but that was in the 70s when they used to pick the Gold Glove awards by who could do the Hustle and who could get the best quaaludes.|
|True. That certainly explains Mark Belanger, but whatta 'bout Wade Boggs? Great hitter, could drank 'bout 70 beers, hung out with Mr. Perfect, sex addict, used to record other players cheatin' to protect himself.
Wait, scratch that last one.
|Oh, would you just give up the home run already? You know you were going to anyways.|
/gives up 3 run bomb
|STFU TREVOR I HEARD WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT RED HEADS|